The Crone
 
There is a legend of a beautiful old crone whose magical prowerness was
known far and wide.  She was legendary for her long flaming red hair and
hypnotic not blue eyes.  And even though she was quite wise and could
easily tell when she was being misled, she sometimes saw good in the person
and would try to bring it out.  One day a gorgeous young man came to her
encampment and professed a willingness to be her servant and student.
Although with her special sight, the crone knew the man for the thief he
was, she also saw a shining light in him.  She welcomed him into her camp
and made him her student.
 
After but a few days, the man could not stand the waiting and in his
impatience and mistrust, he decided the old woman was just using him.  He
did know of a powerful amulet of hers that would protect the bearer from
any physical harm.  The amulet was a small length of bone and he decided to
replace it with a found bone, trying to fool the old crone.  His treachery
done, he crept away in the middle of the night.
 
Now, the crone knew instantly what he had done.  But because the thief was
bearing the amulet, she also knew she could bring no physical harm to him.
She spoke to the spirits of her animal familiars of times past and asked a
great favor of them.
 
That night the thief was visited, in his dreams, by war dancing weasels,
who danced on his belly causing great pain and discomfort in his bowels.
They also nibbled his toes in his sleep, causing him to dream of bloody
stumps.  The nightly visions where so real they caused the thief great
anxiety and upset, even if they could cause no real physical harm.  But
every night he would cramp and bellow in extreme pain from the prancing on
his guts, giving him foul air for his dreams.  Every morning he would awake
fine, but without true rest.  After a fortnight, he stole back into the old
crone's camp and replaced her amulet and has never been heard from again.
 
The moral to this story is never give an old crone your bacula else you get
it in the end.
 
--------------
 
Misceallous Weasel Lore....
 
Weasels flying through the air,
trouble trouble everywhere.
 
Drinking of hob urine will cure both bloated heads and bloated intestines
 
Take a small mouse fed for seven days a diet of grain and ale and feed to
a weasel.  Keep the weasel watched until the remains of the specially
prepared mouse pass through.  Collect all mouse remains and steep for a
while in water.  Let the water cool, then soak a balding head in it.  The
baldness will be cured if this is done on the nights of a full moon for 3
consecutive full moons.  Try it.  It works.
 
The use of hob urine on men and jill urine on women (as dabbed about like
scented oil) gives the wearer the ability to appear different than they are
in reality, to the opposite sex
 
Suzy and the Seattle Spring Fever Ferts
[Posted in FML issue 2609]