[Posted in three parts -- combined.  BIG]
 
Dear FML,
No more anonymity.  What do you think of this?  Let me try to explain as
briefly as possible, although I will probably have to post this in multiple
parts.  I recently sent a $500 donation to the shelter here in MN.  It was
returned with the following message: "Dawn, Thank you for your generous
donation.  However, due to our philosophical differences, we are unable to
accept.  Debbie F. Assistant to the Director, In the Company of Ferrets."
 
I want you, as an FML member to think about and to talk about the issues I
am about to raise.  Feel free to write to me if you wish.
 
My story begins in March of 1997 when my brother brought a baby ferret
(Laweasel) to me as a gift.  I purchased Thelma a month or two later, and
subscribed to the FML to learn more about my wonderful ferrets.
 
I got divorced during the summer of 1997.  During that summer I kept a
special ferret I rescued, named Beetle.  I reconciled with my ex husband,
and purchased another ferret named Attica from a breeder that fall.  Now I
had four ferrets.  Sometime in there I got involved with the local ferret
shelter; In the Company of Ferrets, run by Laura Palmer of Stillwater, MN.
The shelter is in Laura's home.  We started a ferret club named
F.R.O.L.I.C. that summer.
 
Laura asked me to foster a sweet boy named Sammy, because the shelter was
crowded, and he wouldn't play nice with other ferrets, he needed a separate
run time.  Sammy was the best ferret, I loved him so much.  When Laura took
him back to the shelter because she had a prospective home for him I cried
as I said goodbye to him.  The prospect chose another ferret, and I adopted
Sammy.
 
I was busy; as a parent, as an employee, as a student, and I stayed busy
caring for my ferrets.  I still checked on the babies for sale at the pet
shops whenever I was there, I did my best to educate pet store staff,
distributed shelter, club and ferret literature, and I helped the club and
shelter out in any way I could.  I often picked up rescues, and rescued
ferrets from pet stores when necessary.  I made two road trips to Arkansas
during the winter to move ferrets from the MN shelter to a shelter in
Arkansas to relieve over-crowding.
 
Laura asked me to take in two more ferrets who were long-term foster
ferrets.  Ziggy was about seven years old, and Totiana was just three years
old.  Now I was caring for 7 ferrets total.  January 98 my husband and I
split for good.  I had a terrible car accident.  I was in bed for weeks,
and because of a head injury I was off work for two months.  During this
time I took care of all the ferrets, even when I could barely care for
myself.
 
Ziggy the seven-year-old ferret developed adrenal disease and was taking
Lysodren for it.  I paid for his meds out of my own pocket most of the
time.  Sammy developed insulinoma, and I couldn't afford surgery, but I
gave him his pred, and loved him a lot.  Attica, the one I got from the
breeder developed chronic diarreah.  I tried to care for him as well as I
could.  He was on carafate, and then pepto bismal.  I was a single parent
with two children, seven ferrets, a full-time job (managing apartments,
making less than $10,000/year) and a full-time student.  I could not afford
the vet visits, and could barely afford the meds.  Laura knew all this.
 
During the summer of 1999 I wrote to the FML and explained that I was
looking for homes for all the ferrets.  I couldn't afford the vet costs
for the sick ones, and was planning to move in with my then boyfriend.
The townhouse association where he lived did not allow ferrets, and on top
of everything else I was planning a career change that would drastically
change my life.  I was not sure what to do, and I openly considered having
my sick ferrets euthanized.
 
I brought Attica, to the shelter after talking to Laura.  Poor Attica, he
was skinny for a ferret once known as "fat boy."  I told Laura that some
day when I had money I would send a donation.  She said she knew a vet who
would try to figure out what was wrong with him.  He had lost a lot of
weight and I was worried about him.  While I was there Laura and I talked.
She chewed me out for not getting help for Attica sooner.  I had talked
to her frequently, and always told her that he was doing poorly.  She
had suggested the pepto.  I told her that I did not think that expensive
surgeries were a good idea if the ferret was so old, or sick that it would
probably die anyway.
 
It broke my heart to see the shelter ferrets; skin and bones, being force
fed, and given sub q fluids until they just couldn't hold on any longer.
I wondered why she spent so much money on surgeries for ferrets who often
died within a year.  They endured so much misery to live just a little
longer, with no hope of adoption.  It seemed to me that it would be better
to have them euthanized, and try to concentrate on finding homes for
ferrets, instead of running the shelter into the ground.  The shelter was
so dirty that day.  I was hopeful for Attica, and sad for the others as I
left.
 
Laura was always trying to get help with fundraising for the shelter vet
bills, complaining about how tired she was from her round-the-clock nursing
of sick ferrets.  I continued to wonder why she didn't focus more on caring
for the healthy ferrets.  The day I brought Attica to the shelter and
expressed my belief on euthanasia as a humane option, she got very upset
with me.  We did not see eye to eye on the issues.
 
She explained her position by telling me that she had lost a human child to
cancer, and she seemed to feel very strongly that no ferret be euthanized.
I was not upset by our differing philosophies.  These are issues that
people have struggled with forever, and I believe that we are all entitled
to our opinions.  I never presume to tell anyone how to make their
decisions, but I reserve the right to make my decisions according to my
beliefs.  I was upset that she lashed out at me personally for having a
different opinion.
 
Shortly afterward some people I knew from the ferret club called me on a
Saturday and said they'd take all my ferrets.  They were at my house within
an hour, and they left with all my ferrets, and everything I had that I
associated with them.  I went through a lot of grieving and pain over this,
but at the time I knew it was best.  I wondered if Laura sent them, but I
knew that my ferrets would be loved and cared for in their home.
 
Some time later I tried to contact Laura, and the people who adopted my
ferrets, and nobody replied to my e-mails.  I later found out that the
people who adopted my babies had experienced a personal tragedy, and were
very busy.  By this time I was writing very angry, inflammatory, and rude
e-mails.  I couldn't believe that nobody cared enough to just let me know
how the ferrets were doing.  Unfortunately I managed to make everyone mad
at me, and subsequently, I was mad at them.  Things had changed, and it
looked as if I would be able to take my ferrets back if they would allow
it.  They would not.  I think of those ferrets often.  I have three other
ferrets now.  I have no support network here, as you can tell by the
response I received to the donation I sent.
 
I am not angry, I am not judging, I just want the FML to know about me,
about Laura, her shelter In the Company of Ferrets and the club known as
FROLIC, if they club still exists.  I am wondering if anyone in Minnesota
knows what became of Thelma, Laweasel, Beetle, Attica, Sammy, Ziggy and
Totiana.  I am wondering if anyone will tell them they are always in my
heart.  I am wondering if anyone in their right mind would turn down a
donation that was intended to help with the expenses that they must have
accrued.  I am wondering if anyone will send me news of them.
[Posted in FML issue 3249]