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Dervish the WonderFerret <[log in to unmask]>
Date:
Sun, 8 Nov 1998 22:25:14 -0600
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Dervish the WonderFerret here.  I refuse to get involved in the
most-perfect-ferret debate, although I do lean towards Easy Off
because of (a) Texan solidarity, and (b) feminist solidarity.
 
To support my contention that I am, in fact, the cutest ferret in the
world, I offer forth the following proof:
 
--I was the grocery store with Mommy.  Even though an extremely cute child
  was in the cart next to me, I got a crowd of people wanting to pet me and
  see me.  Ha!  Humans will cast aside their own kind to swoon at my paws!
 
--I carry around Emily's round hairbrush in my mouth like a dog with a
  bone.  Never fails to get a cuddle and kiss from Mommy!  I'm such a smart
  ferret.
 
--I stick my head in glasses of Kool-Aid and get the white parts of my face
  all red.
 
--My ferret-speed-bump move has reduced big, burly macho-men to cooing.
 
--As has my yawning.
 
--I converted three cat people and four dog people into ferret people
  within fifteen minutes of meeting them!
 
--I'm practically a model, I can strike a pose so well.
 
If anyone disputes my niche as Cutest Ferret Ever in Recorded History, they
can take it up with me.  I've been to a few Lincoln-Douglas debates with
Mommy, and I think I've got the hang of it.
 
-Great-High-Queen-Sheba Dervish the WonderFerret, Cutest Ferret Ever in
Recorded History, and Meghan ("What's that clicking noise coming from the
bedroom?  And where's Dervish?")
[Posted in FML issue 2488]

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