Part 1  [combined with part 2]
 
I've had a very difficult time keeping up with e-mail due to health
issues combined with working full-time, being a relatively new mom,
caring for 100 critters, writing, running a non-profit biz, and doing
humane education programs.  I try to scan the FML every morning when I
get to work, because I can get more personal work done there as opposed
to at home......like writing this post.  The FML teaches me a lot, not
just about ferrets, but about people too.  People, myself included,
can be downright obnoxious and irrational at times.  I have to hold my
tongue while glimpsing through some topics, such as the Valerie/military
rejection thread.  I'm guilty of having strong opinions about some
things, and while intellectually I know that rarely is an issue black and
white, emotionally I've had a tendency to be a bit stubborn in my own
views at times.  This, of course, is why I'm poking my head in the FML
door today.  For the record, before I jump on my "other" soapbox, I want
to say that I admire Valerie.  I do not know her personally, but if I
were to take her at face value, I would have to say she is not only a
wonderful person, but also a caring and responsible ferret mom.  I'd
first want to know more about her to confirm my initial beliefs, but I
don't think I would hesitate to adopt ferrets to her if the opportunity
presented itself.  (I will never get over how some things get so twisted
and blown up).
 
I think the age threads were a result of the Valerie thread.  I could be
wrong, but they pushed my buttons either way.  To categorize a certain
age group or "family status" as being one way or another is simply wrong
IMO.  I've been an animal lover my entire life despite the fact that the
family who raised me truly disliked pets.  I had to confine my animal
"hobby" to the outdoors.  By the time I was 10 years old I had a thriving
and HEALTHY colony of feral cats that I cared for (folks did help when I
insisted that vet care was needed).  I was a successful rabbit breeder
and had written my first book (albeit unpublished) on rabbit care.  All
throughout grade school I cared for 30 or so animals at any given time:
cats, rabbits, small rodents, birds, snakes, AND I successfully rehabbed
wildlife.  I have lived and breathed animals for about 30 of my almost
36 years of life.  I now do quite a bit of rescue and a whole lot of
humane education programs.  The most frustrating animal situations I've
encountered have involved ADULT humans.  I've seen animals brought in by
parents because a kid got a bad grade.  Now THAT'S a scary lesson for a
kid!  I have yet to hear of a collector who is under the age of 30.  I
have seen great abuse carried out by adults.
 
My point is that IMO age should be weighed less than the demonstrated
ability and knowledge of a person.  I was just 21 when I adopted my very
first ferret (Thank you, Norm - GCFA).  I'd been living on my own since
19, made a very modest salary and struggled to keep my little condo.  My
ferrets managed to come first, as did my other animals.  And my son Sam,
who is just 13 months old now, has both seen and demonstrated great
respect for and gentleness with the animals I allow him to interact with.
People are amazed at his way with animals.  Despite this how many
shelters would refuse to adopt to me simply because of the age of my son?
There are many families out there with teenagers whom I would turn away!
I have also turned away teenagers NOT because of their own age, but
because of the immaturity, ignorance and poor attitude of their adult
parents.  And what about all those pets given up to shelters because a
new human baby entered the picture?  Should shelters consider excluding
potential adopters that are of childbearing age?  What about people whose
jobs may require relocations?  Or people who may have to suddenly and
without warning devote all of their time and money to a sick family
member?  (You can utilize a medical history form from your doctor for use
during screening).  Also, don't forget to exclude anyone who's in the
military reserves especially since war seems inevitable these days.  Who
knows?  Maybe we'll even see another draft in our lifetime, so count out
any potential adopters who would be eligible for that.  I mean, come on!
I don't even want to broach the subject of kids heading off to
college.....
 
Part 2
 
It is always in the best interest of the animal to seek out that perfect
forever home, but no one has the power to predict what the outcome will
be based on the age of the adopter.  Use the tools you have.  Use your
gut instinct.  Research and do the necessary legwork, but don't
discriminate.  By doing so, shelters and rescuers are turning away
wonderful homes.  I've been more disgusted with people my own age than
with people much younger than myself.  Potential adopters should be
evaluated on an individual basis.  Meet their kids.  Learn about who they
are as people and as families.  Then make an educated decision either to
adopt or not to adopt.  Many shelters might respond that they don't have
time for all that personal nonsense!  They have ferrets to care for!
Well, isn't that sort of a Catch-22?  More like a squirrel chasing its
tail?  I believe that if you don't have the time to properly and fairly
screen potential adopters, then you don't have the time to efficiently
and effectively operate a rescue/shelter.  I'm speaking of individuals
seeking potential adopters as well.
 
In concluding my long boring diatribe, I wanted to relay a wonderful
story about a young girl who adopted from me.  I had 2 ferrets named
Lenny and Squiggy who were abandoned at the clinic because the owner
couldn't care for them any longer.  Lenny obviously had adrenal problems,
so I had the surgery done right away.  He recovered nicely, but never
quite looked like the handsome ferret he once was.  In fact, he was sort
of scary looking.  I had a few potential adopters for Squiggy, but I
didn't want to separate them.  So they remained with me for what seemed
like a lifetime.  Squiggy was a great educational ferret, so I'd bring
the two of them to programs.  I met a young girl named Laura at a school
program one day.  She was just 9 years old.  Laura was fixated on Lenny
and asked why he looked so different from Squiggy.  After talking with
her a bit I learned that her dog had just recently been hit by a car (let
out accidentally by her FATHER).  Her parents would not allow her to get
another dog.  I saw a little of me in her, patted her on the back and
said goodbye as she skipped away with one of my flyers.  In my hectic
world, I forgot all about her until several days later when the phone
rang.  A little voice on the phone asked how Lenny the ferret was.  It
was Laura.  We spoke for a few minutes and then she asked if Lenny was up
for adoption.  My reflex was to say no, but instead I told her I wasn't
sure and that I'd have to speak with her mom or dad.  She said ok in a
sad quiet voice and we hung up.
 
A couple of days later I received a phone call from Laura's father who
said she hadn't been able to stop talking about them.  He scheduled a
time to bring her to visit the ferrets.  The visit was extremely
revealing and rewarding.  What I saw were a father and daughter who were
deeply connected and a little girl who handled herself with great dignity
and maturity (for a 9 year old).  She interacted with Lenny and Squiggy
well.  She was gentle and caring and almost instantly devoted to them.
And the ferrets were equally comfortable with Laura.  The visit lasted
about 2 hours.  Both Laura and her father knew that Lenny had some
special needs, yet they insisted they would properly tend to both
ferrets.  I felt really good about the adoption, so I let them go.
 
Laura kept in constant touch with me, asking questions and updating me
on her ferrets' latest antics.  A year passed and Laura called to let me
know Lenny was sick and needed hand feeding.  The vet had shown her how
to do it.  Despite her sadness, there was a sense of pride in her voice
when she told me how she'd prepare his food and feed him before school,
then right after school, and immediately before bedtime.  She was
concerned that Squiggy would be sad and lonely if Lenny died.  After
talking to both her and her father, they scheduled another visit and
brought both ferrets along.  Despite Lenny's deteriorating health, both
ferrets looked happy and well-cared for.  I had a lonely little female
ferret name Kayla that needed a new home.  She was young, but was rather
laid back and calm.  Kayla and Squiggy hit it off right away.  Kayla was
very passive and gentle with Lenny as well.  Kayla went home with them
and Lenny passed away during surgery about 2 months later.  That was
about 5 years ago.  I still keep in contact with Laura and she still has
ferrets, except now she has 5 of them including Squiggy and Kayla.  She
is now 16 years old and knows a whole lot about ferrets and the meaning
of lifelong commitment.  She is a lucky young girl and I was equally
lucky to find her.
 
Kim S
Author, Ferrets for Dummies
Director, Animals for Awareness
[Posted in FML issue 4079]