Jester left our realm sometime between 1:30am and 5am this morning.
Jester had insulinoma and an abdominal tumor. He was estimated to be
about 7 yrs old. Jester is the only ferret that would come when called
any time of day as long as I called long and loud enough to waken him
when he was sleeping. He liked to sleep under the sheets on my daybed,
but not when I was on it. He loved Nbones.

Last weekend Jester broke with a bleeding ulcer. By Tuesday the
bleeding was stopped but then his lower extremities retained fluid and
he stopped walking. Our vet recommended lasix and massages to reduce
the fluid, and pain medication if he showed he was in pain. By Thursday
Jester only lifted his head. This entire time Jester allowed me to
carefully and gently syringe a good amount (20-30ccs) of baby food
recipe several times daily. I set the alarm for middle of the night
feedings, cleaning and bedding changes. I drove home over an extended
lunch hour to feed and clean Jester and to change his bedding.

Several times I considered having our vet help Jester to leave. Jester
was not showing signs of pain, his appetite was good, and he was aware
of what was going on so I waited. Jester left us in the wee hours of
the morning laying beside me and between the girls (dogs).

I always struggle with the when it is time issue, as many of us do.
Even in cases such as Jesters when I know the outcome, just not the
when. I want them to leave us as comfortably as possible at home,
surrounded by the familiar and loving energy in our home. If pain
becomes an issue, I have our vet help them leave. With Jester, pain
was not an issue.

This morning as I layed Jester out for the others to say their
goodbyes, I wonder at how sensitive Serena is. Several times she gently
sniffed the blankets, then Jester. She looked at me after each time,
her beautiful head slightly tilted. I reassured her he was gone and it
was o.k. I spent much time this last week reassuring her 'it was o.k.'.
Perhaps she didn't quite understand why dying is o.k. Serena will be
quiet for a day or two in mourning, she always is.

Athena followed her sister's cue and sniffed but seems not as affected
emotionally to Jester's death. Athena sleeps on a pillow beside my head
and she had been very careful not to step on Jester these last few
nights as he slept with us. Usually Athena bounces not really noticing
a ferret sleeping under the blankets so she is somewhat aware of the
circumstances. I expect Athena will be her normal goofy self.

A few of the ferrets stopped to say their goodbyes, enough time was
given so no one will wonder.

It's been a long emotional minimal sleep week. I'm thankful that Jester
was able to pass gently at home. RIP my angel.

tle
www.ferretfamilyservices.org

[Posted in FML 7753]