Condolences to those with sick, lost, or angeled litter-box-shunners...
 
Where's Arthur Murray when you need him?  I need him to teach Taz the
*proper* way to dance!
 
See, it all began when the cat found out that he could jump up on a chair
to avoid being eaten by a ferret that is only 1/4 his size.  The problem
is, ferrets can use Pherret Physics to solve problems like this.  And Taz
is quite the mathematician!  The cat does have recourse, though.  He's
learned the valuable art of self-defense called "Whap-A-Fert" and he's got
a black belt in that art.  Well, more than a black belt...he's *all* black!
Must be a Jedi Master or something, huh?
 
Anyway, Taz is no dumb chicken.  He's learned that attempting to climb
up on the chair while the cat is watching will only get him several
well-placed swats from the cat.  So he normally just waits until the cat
falls asleep (usually within 10 minutes or so), *then* climbs up and gives
the cat a rude awakening! :)
 
This morning, he was NOT in a mood to wait.  The cat was as accurate as he
always is and Taz became very frustrated.  HE WANTED THAT CAT!!!  So, he
goes into his Wild Weasel War Dance.  He must have forgotten the steps.
Slammed into the fridge, the table (3 times), the cabinets (twice) and the
stove (7 times).  The cat wasn't impressed.  No amount of Ferret Spell
Casting (FSC) would cause the cat to suddenly fall off the chair, either.
That just made Taz even more frustrated.
 
So...he leaps up towards the chair.  Taz weighs 4 pounds.  His launching
mechanizm was designed for a ferret weighing 2 1/2 pounds.  It failed.  Taz
sails cleanly under the chair and slides along the floor.  This happens
four times before he finally gives up and decides to see if anything new
is up with the hanging fern in the living room.
 
Ever see a cat laugh?
 
Todd and the Fuzzbutt Rodeo Clowns!
 
---
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[Posted in FML issue 3196]