Ohio gozaimasu Kuroitachi! [J.] Good morning Ferrets! In your dream of
floating above downtown Tokyo, could that be what you heard, ah so desuka?
(Isn't that right?)
Oh well, maybe that's quite a stretch I'll admit. But out here in
Frettchenvergnuegen Land of Seattle there's quite a large Japanese
community, and it's diffficult not to learn a little Japanese language
and culture.
It's interesting to note that Japanese culture defines ferrets in a unique
manner to differentiate them from the human. For example, my name,
Lipinski, is spoken as Lipinski-san. The animals name is hyphenated "chan"
rather than "san."
My Japanese customer by name of Yoshizumi Oba (Oba-san) boards his silver
mitt hob ferret here frequently when he trips between Seattle and LA or
between Seattle and Japan. His ferret's name is Bean. However, on the
Boarding Agreement, his ferret's name, Bean, is always entered as
"Bean-chan" whereas Yoshi's name is always entered as "Oba-san."
Another aspect of Japanese culture is "Haiku." This is simple poetry, very
ancient, and must always consist of three lines with syllable requirements
of 5, 7, and 5. Here is an example:
Thanks, Ms. Lipinski
you're a welcome diversion
from Ms. Lewinsky
10.) Jockey Ferret Contest. This event is relatively simple and quite
comical. The children love it and are eager to compete. The owner goes
down on all fours. The ferret is placed on the owners back, just about
where a saddle would be worn. A netter runs alongside the crawling owner
and fields a long handled, large salmon fishing net. The idea here is to
net the ferret in the event the ferret decides to dismount before the race
ends. So far, this has never happened, but it certainly excites curiosity
from the park passers-by and the joggers. As you may imagine, it's quite an
extraordinary sight.
Objective: The "horsie" has 30 seconds maximum to crawl on all fours the
greatest distance possible in the shortest time to complete a round-trip of
a 25-foot long grass course. Eash contestant has the option to two trial
runs and may select the fastest course time. They quickly learn that an
abrupt start uses up one of their two trial runs. Also the contestant is
not permitted to hold the ferret in any position during his "gallop." If the
ferret dismounts the contest is concluded at that place and time.
11.) Balloon Burtsters Contest. Another very simple event. Four fully
inflated balloons are corner positioned in a wire ferret cage. The cage
measures 24" X 18" X 14" and has a large top-opening door. The contestant's
ferret is placed inside the cage and the door closed.
Objective: Within the time period of 60 seconds the time for the ferret to
burst the first balloon is recorded. It's suggested that the ferret be
removed quickly from the cage thereafter, since once the first balloon is
burst, the ferret very quickly attacks the remaining three balloons,
although not all ferrets do this. The contestant must inflate all the
balloons his ferret burst to ready the cage for the following contestant's
ferret. No ferret has injested any balloon or part thereof in this contest.
It's no secret that some contestants' ferrets get a lot of practice popping
inflated balloons at home the day before the Olympics.
Ex post facto. [L.] After the deed is done.
[F]erret [E]ndowment for [R]esearch, [R]ehab, [E]ducation & [T]raining
[S]ociety,
NorthWest F E R R E T S NW, E. Lipinski, Director. Ferret
events 3 times/year:
last Sundays of January (New Year Party) and Jun and Aug (Ferret
Frolics/Olympics)
_____________________________________________________________________
Edward Lipinski, Frettchenvergnuegen from the Frettchenlustbarkeitsfuehrer !
Frettchenvergnuegen [G.] Joy of Ferrets. F...fuehrer [G.] Ferret frolics
leader.
[F]erret [E]ndowment for [R]esearch,[R]ehab, [E]ducation & [T]raining
[S]ociety, NorthWest.
[Posted in FML issue 2224]
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