I'm very insecure by nature, and I need to know that my ferrets love me.
They prove this in 3 ways:
  1) lots of kisses
  2) lots of hugs
  3) sleeping on the bed near me
 
I'll like to share how I got them to do this, so anybody who wants some
extra affection can try it.
 
1) For the kisses, when I first get the ferret, I would pick him/her
   up a lot.  I put them up near my face until they give me a lick.  If
   the ferret doesn't like licking, it helps if you've been drinking fruit
   juice or coke.  I put them down as soon as they give me a lick.  You'll
   have to be a little careful with biters: press your lips together, and
   don't put them near your nose.  Sprite is a nipper, and she still
   kisses.  I earn her kisses at the risk of losing my face, though :)
   (Just kidding, she's not that bad).  Birch shower me with kisses
   everytime I ask her if she loves me.  Could be a fluke, but I don't
   think so.
 
2) Hugs is when I reach down and stretch out my hand, and my kids wrap
   their paws around me.  One way to get them to do this is if you are
   standing next to the barrier at your door (Everybody lives with 28"
   barriers at their doors, right?).  Reach down your hand and the weasels
   jump against the barrier.  Eventually they'll grab your hand, then you
   just pick them up.  Sooner or later, they get the hang of it.  Some of
   them are more reluctant.  Sand almost never hugs, he also kisses more
   reluctantly.  You can see him sigh when he kisses, it's very cute.
 
3) Getting them to sleep on your bed is harder.  The first thing is to
   make sure your bed is the most comfortable place in the room.  Mine has
   a sheepskin rug for the kids to sleep on.  It use to have this pillow
   that Birch loves, if I switch pillows, she'll go away.  Eventually, I
   had more kids and the pillow got a bit small, they keep shoving me off
   and I developed neck pains.  So I got a king-size pillow (I have a
   single futon).  Then of course they won't sleep on that.  It helps that
   I can't sleep unless I know they are all safe and happy on the bed, so
   I'll find them from where ever they are hiding and put them on the bed.
   Sooner or later, they are too tired to run away and they sleep.  I did
   this for 3 or 4 months with Bear.  Ferrets also attract other ferrets,
   so if you got a couple on your bed already, the others are more likely
   to join them.  They sleep on my bed at least 80% of the time.  My
   favourite mornings are when I woke up, choking for air, because Birch
   is once again sleeping on my throat.
 
Someone will probably point out that if I train them to do all this, then
it's not really love.  All I can say is that I'm too busy living in my
little dream world to pay attention to minor details like that.  Plus,
they trained me to do way more, and I love them to bits!
 
If anybody has other methods to acquire ferrety love, I'll be happy to
learn about them!
 
Have a day full of ferrety affection!
 
// ***********************************************
// Selina, Birch, Dief, Sprite, Storm, Sand & Bear
// http://www.cgl.uwaterloo.ca/~ssiu
[Posted in FML issue 2889]