Hi Folks!
 
We just thunk that we'd write a real quick-like (yeah, right!) note to let
folks know what's been goin' on around here.  So here it is be.  Hmmm.
Somehow that don't sound right.  We'll try again.  Here it is was:
 
First off we'd like to say that we sure is glad that Mo Bob is back.  We
sure has missed him.  He's kinda crazy like our Paw Paw is.  Welcome back,
Wildman!
 
We has finally gotten used to that thang that Paw Paw wears on his laig.  We
has rubbed our ownselves all over it and got rid of that vet smell it had on
it.  He done stopped by the people vet's office today to get it adjusticated
a little better.  The Nurse Lady allowed as how she sure did like the musk
cologne we was wearin'.  He just smiled and said, "Thank you.  It's a new
French fragrance that Mee Maw gave me.  It's called Eau du Fert Poof."
 
He takes the thing off every night before he crawls into our bed.  We has
done our best to put it where it belongs but he keeps catchin' us and
puttin' it where we can't reach it.  We done got even though.  Last night we
stole his bean bag ash tray and hid it where the sun won't shine on it for a
long time.  Then we knocked his Right Guard off of his condo and hid the
button thingy that makes it work inside of Mee Maw's pillow case.  She
didn't get much sleep on account of because the button thingy kept pokin'
her in the right ear while Odie snuffled in her left ear.  When the alarm
went off this morning, she retrieved the button thingy, reinstalled it on
the sputtering deodorant can, and hid the whole thing in her secret
underwear drawer.  Mee Maw ain't too much fun sometimes...
 
Anyway, our Paw Paw is feelin' a lot better now that he can walk again.  He
even played on the Internet for awhile today with the new Netscape
Navigrator thing that he got.  It don't take much to amuse his simple mind.
We loves him anyway.
 
Him and us sure was happy that a British friend of ours done named a fert
after him.  We was also happy that a Tasmanian friend of ours put a link to
our web page on her page and said some nice things about us.  We keeps
getting nice letters and cards from our friends all over the world.  We
gotted tle's newsletter which was really neat!  Paw Paw lights an oil candle
that showed up on the front stoop one morning before he says his prayers
each night.  We gotted a BBQ (Braaii-sp?) recipe from South Africa.  We
gotted a really great package of stuff from our Anonymous friend in Ca Ca
land - complete with recipes and spices.  We even gotted a neat color poster
with pictures of ferts and other critters on it.  We even got a Web Card!
Heck, we has gotted so much neat stuff lately that our Paw Paw would have
been hard pressed to stay down in the dumps because his laig don't work like
it used to.
 
Most of all, we has gotten lots of love in the form of nice letters from
good folks.  You folks sure has done a lot to bring smiles to all of us here
at the Schieman Estate (hovel).  Thank you so much!  We just hope that we
can return the favor somehow.
 
Many much loves, thanks, dooks and hugs.  May your God smile upon you and
take a liking to you.  We sure have.
 
Tater, Odie, Paw Paw and Mee Maw
[Posted in FML issue 1683]