Dedickated to da one Smudge wuvs:
 
     Woses r wed,
          Viwets r boo,
     Sammi's sweet,
          Smudge wants to marwy you.
 
Please allow Smudge to introduce himself.  Smudge was Bob's travelin'
companion, so Smudge is vwery worldly.  Smudge just settled in wit Ma and is
now home-fairwit and vwery finanually stable ( sotrin' waisens an gwayps an
socs up).  Ma calls Smudge her gentle gaint.  Smudge 3 an a half pounds of
wuvable, kissable fairwit.  Smudge all alone an would wuv you an hug you an
feed you an pet you an kiss you an snuggle wit you an potect you an play wit
you an we could dook together an make our own wardance of wuv for all
eternity like a sorrow thru a song.  An we can carry da tune to da honey
moon and we can play it all night long.  (Blush) (Smudge vwery rowmanic,
too) (Blush)
 
Thought we've never met, like da story da Ma told Smudge bout fairwits named
Issac an Becky fallin in wuv fore dey ever met, Smudge knows Sammi is da
special wuv for him witout ever meetin or nuttin.  An like 'nother story Ma
wed to Smudge (actully, Ma's wittle girl tinks dat Ma is weedin to her) bout
how nother ferret, Jachob, waited 14 years to marwy his wuv, Rachael, Smudge
will wait for Sammi, even if it takes 14 years.
 
Smudge knows dat Uncle Bob would give Smudge one of dem dowry tings for
Sammi's Pa to have.  So's how bout it Samantha, my big bewty?  Can Smudge
ask your Pa for your paw in wholy matrimoney?  Would you, Samantha take dis
Smudge as youse big ol' fairwit hubby an make him da happeest hob in da hole
wide world?  We could dokadookadooka down da brydlepath of life together.
 
All da wuv in my big ol' heart,
 
Smudge
[Posted in FML issue 1642]