CLEAR AND PRESENT DANGER: Any ferret under your bedsheets, sniffing at any
part you wish to preserve.
 
CRAP TRAP: That space near the desk where ferrets insist on pooping, and
where human hands do not fit.
 
DOING THE CAN CAN: When a ferret insists on dragging your half-full soda
around the room.
 
DOUBLE TROUBLE: When a kit has four upper canines instead of the normal two.
 
FEAR FREE ZONE: 1. When your house is finally ferret-proofed. 2. When your
community/state has legalized ferrets.
 
FOOD FLOP: When a ferret drops in for dinner. Drops into the food dish,
that is.
 
LAZY GAZE: When a ferret stares at the treat in your hand, but refuses to
move two inches to get it.
 
LICKER STICKER: A ferret that lovingly licks your chin before biting it.
 
LOAD ZONE: The litterbox.
 
MEECES PIECES: The occasional parts found after a mouse dinner.
 
ON THE SCAT TRACK: Cleaning up after a ferret with the runs.
 
PICASSO PIZZA: What you get after a ferret upchucks kibble.
 
POOP DECK: The bottom part of a cage that catches the droppings.
 
POOP STICK: A device used to knock fossilized poop from cage screening.
 
ROLL PLAYING: When one ferret is latched on another ferret's neck, and
spins like an alligator.
 
RUBBER CHECK: Looking for rubber particles in ferret poop.
 
SANDY CLAWS: The condition of the ferret's feet after leaving the litter
box.
 
SCOOTLES: A ferret dragging its butt across the room.
 
Bob C and 22 MO Ferret Freeloaders
[Posted in FML issue 2422]