Sorry for not posting for a while, but somehow my password was corrupted and
I couldn't logon to the 'pooter.  All is better now that I've yelled at the
creep responsible.  But now I have a really cool password.
 
I got a kick out of the first message that came up.  It was flagged with the
subject line "EMERGENCY--READ FIRST." It was an anonymous mail from someone
who copied William's question regarding a single testicle removal.
 
Q: "Would this work? Sounds like a good idea."
 
A: You would have to be a nut to fall for that one.
 
I could find nothing that even remotely resembled this question in my data
base, nor on the more popular literature services.  So I had to go to human
medical literature and stuff of a general nature from comparative vertebrate
sources so I could back up what I already knew.  I wouldn't recommend
removing a single testicle, because you would be putting a ferret under the
knife for absolutely nothing.  Without resorting to fancy terminology, male
hormone levels are controlled by a part of the brain that is normally
unaffected by the removal of the testes.  Remove a testicle, and the brain
senses the lowered hormone levels, and sends a signal to pick it up.  While
I cannot give a time frame for the return to a normal hormone level, my
guess it would be within a few weeks, if that long (I think even a week
might be conservative).
 
Of course the period would vary depending upon if the ferret was rutting, or
in a lowered-activity state.  As for smell, I doubt if it would make a
difference.  As for aggression, it might lower a bit immediately following
the procedure, but not much, and it would last long.
 
There is one thing I would like to make clear about size and growth and
neutering.  Animals that have been neutered prior to reaching their adult
size never reach their potiential maximum size.  But many other factors come
into play as well; the health of the mother, the quality of nutrition,
disease, and various factors within the environment.  I think Marshall
Farm's ferrets (as well as ANY OTHER early-neutered ferret) are smaller than
they should be due to their early neutering, but it isn't as obvious as you
might think, and as far as I've been able to quantify, only about a half
inch or so, and maybe a couple of ounces.
 
Skeletal maturity in the ferret is at about 7-9 months.  That means the
skeleton has reached 90-95% of it's total growth.  It is roughly similar to
the size of 18-year-old males; some growth may occur, but compared to what
has already developed, it is relatively minor.  The skeleton is not directly
regulated by male hormone levels; otherwise females would never grow much
(Females do have a source of testosterone, which continually produces small
amounts of the steroid their entire lives, which is why my Granny grew a
moustache after menopause).  The skeleton does react very rapidly to muscle
mass and strength, and will "grow into the muscles." But the contribution by
genetics is far greater than that made by muscle mass, so the size
difference between the skeletons of early- and late-neutered ferrets is
relatively minor, and may not be as pronouced as that by diet, exercise, or
the health of the mother.
 
The major difference between young males and older males in in muscle mass.
And muscle mass is directly related to testosterone (and other steroids)
levels (Which is the main reason lazy men have larger muscles than
hard-working women).  The reason most neutered ferrets look so much smaller
than whole males is NOT skeletal, but almost entirely because of
steroid-meditated muscle growth.  Early neutered males develop a female-type
musculature, so ferrets from Marshall Farms look like large females.  Late
neutered males start out much larger, but, once the male poison is removed,
gradually slim down to the effeminate form.  They look smaller, but
obviously, their skeleton hasn't shrunk.  The bottom line is, the only way
you can keep a male really large is by keeping those little footballs on the
playing field.  And you only need one football to play, which is why we have
two; one's a spare.
 
Well, you COULD give them a remote control and feed them beer to keep them
large, but it is not the same thing.  Now THAT would be a great picture for
Jeane Carley; a big pot-bellied ferret sleeping in an easy chair, remote in
hand, beer and chips scattered about, facing a TV screen displaying a ferret
with a minature football in it's mouth.  Dook, dook, dook, hike!
 
Bob C and Mo' 18 Tackling Dummies. (In memory of Gus)
[Posted in FML issue 1836]