It was with great sadness I was informed, via telephone, of Lisa's FML
post regarding Martini.  I was sadder when I read it.  Sad because it
didn't belong on the FML, and I am shocked Bill Gruber allowed it.  I am
offended at his inability to understand the difference between a public
and a personal dispute.  But since the issue is now public, I will
mention MY side.
 
I HAVE told Lisa about Martini, more than once.  I told her while facing
her on her couch, with her husband listening in the other room (you said
that talk saved your marriage, remember?).  I told her in Toronto, in
front of other people.  I told her in Las Vegas, again in front of
witnesses.  I have even told her vet there was NOTHING osteological that
could be reported, that Martini's skeleton was unremarkable, with no
tumor growth or malformation noted.  I have told her in emails, which
I have kept printed copies as part of the donation record.  Each time
I discussed it with her, I said I would look again, and if I found
ANYTHING, I would report it.  I have looked at Martini several times now,
but there is nothing to find and nothing to report.  Lisa thinks there
is, and assumes my refusal to "report" as a refusal to give her closure.
 
Lisa's problem is I will not write a necropsy report specifically about
Martini.  I will not for two specific reasons: one, Martini was sent to
me by a vet, and like blood tests and X-rays, laboratory reports belong
to the doctor.  But the more important reason was that I was not ASKED
to do a necropsy.  Martini was donated with the following message:
 
"...the owner understands and supports your research and wants to donate
the ferret. I suspect a [bone tumor]...let us know if you see anything."
 
I did NOT do a necropsy, but I wouldn't have done one anyway.  I cannot
do one for no more reason than the body was frozen for shipping.  More
importantly, I never received the type of medical records that would have
allowed me to do so.  I always look at a superficial level, but depending
on preservation, even a superficial look may be useless.  Legally, I
don't think I can even write a necropsy report--I am not an approved
pathology laboratory.  I don't even know how or why Lisa ever thought I
would do a necropsy; she never heard that from me.
 
The only thing I will ever report is what I find osteologically and only
then when the research is finished.  For example, Sukie donated a beloved
ferret and I haven't reported my findings back to her.  Not because I am
hiding something, or because I am evasive, but because any conclusion
requires data for understanding, and until the research is done, the
conclusions cannot be made.  You simply cannot understand if a bone is
normal or not until you have a large enough sample to figure an accurate
standard deviation.  Another friend donated a beloved angora ferret,
and again, I can't say much until I have a real understanding of what
"normal" is.  The range of size in ferrets is tremendous, and the effects
of neutering, diet, and breeding greatly complicate the issue.  My only
other reporting debt I know about is to a person who donated a ferret
that had part of the cranium surgically removed, but I have lost track
of them after they moved (my fault, not theirs).
 
I don't solicit dead ferrets from owners.  I have mentioned my research,
but I don't ask people to send me dead ferret bodies.  I NEVER asked Lisa
for Martini.  I was approached, and when I thought the donation was
legitimate, I accepted.  In fact, when people ask me, I usually ignore
the first email, making the assumption that people who are really serious
will ask again.  Then, if asked a second time, I generally try to talk
them out of it.  Sukie offered me a second ferret, which I declined.
Bull Gruber made an offer, which I declined.  ONCE I solicited donations
from a vet who saw a lot of ferrets, but I have not done it since.  There
was even a time I had an opportunity for obtaining culled ferrets from a
commercial breeding establishment, and I declined that.  There are quite
literally dozens of FML people who could confirm these statements.
Rather than take ferrets from individual people, I prefer donations from
shelters, where it is less of a personal issue, and someday perhaps the
knowledge gained can help the community as a whole.
 
The research I am doing is geared to finding a way to distinguish
domesticated ferrets from wild polecats.  I am also working towards
proving the feral ferrets in New Zealand are quite different than pet
ferrets in Europe and the USA.  A few offshoots of the research are an
understanding of the effect of diet on the teeth, and how adrenal disease
reduces the density of bone.  I use skeletons to do this.  The process of
getting a beloved pet to a museum artifact is, to me, quite disturbing.
I love ferrets deeply, and it is personally painful to prepare them for
study.  Done right, it takes considerable time.  As the research is
finished, the skeletons will be sent to the Smithsonian, for permanent
curation.
 
I suspect Lisa thinks she can embarrass me into making some type of
report, which is why she posted here.  But she is wrong.  I am not
embarrassed about my actions or conduct, and while this business does not
belong on the FML in any shape or form, I am not in any way disturbed
that people know about it.  Lisa, you cannot bully me into writing
something I am not prepared to write.  I did not do a necropsy, I never
said I would; all I looked at were the bones, and as I have told you
repeatedly, there was nothing conclusive to report.  After three years,
don't you think there might be some sort of problem being manifested
beyond your complaint?  You don't need a "report" for closure, you just
need to learn acceptance that sometimes you can do everything right and
still bad things will happen.  I'm still your friend, Lisa, but please,
you need to move on.  This isn't healthy.
 
And Bill, you have to consider this question.  Why have most of the vets
and ferret experts quit posting on the FML?  Your actions have placed our
friendship in jeopardy, and I will reevaluate my participation in this
forum.  The FML is a ferret list, not place where personal grievances
can be aired in an effort to harm a person's reputation.  I thought
better of you.
 
Bob C
 
[Moderator's note: I think Bob and I don't see eye to eye on this one
and I've responded to him extensively in a private note.  Of course,
no matter how I personally feel about any issue, Bob or any other
subscriber has every right to air any opinions on this list provided
they don't "flame."   And Bob most certainly did not flame.  BIG]
[Posted in FML issue 3868]