** a light pink (once albino) ferret prances in the room with her hot
pink bell collar on**
 
**She finds her way to the podium and climbs up to the microphone and
waits for the noise to die down**
 
"Hello?  Helloooo?  Is this thing on?  Ahh..  now I can hear me!  My name
is Fiona and Im a 1.5 year old ferret who has taken over my humans life!
Now my brothers think they run the show, but we all know who the princess
is around here.."
 
**a haughty look crosses her ruby eyes as she dares anyone to challange
her**
 
"Now... what did I come here to say?  Raisins, Chew weasles...Oh I know
it was important!"
 
**She shuffles her papers around on the podium with delicate paws and
finally finds the one she wants and stands back up**
 
" My human just started selling Mary Kay skin care and make up stuffs!
Shes been doing it for about a week and Ive been working on her the whole
time!  Finally, thanks to FLO I have successfully brain washed her, so
that she will be donating 10% of her profits to S.O.S.  She (we) have
named it the Mary Kay Ferret Foundation!  She really wants to be able to
deposit a bunch of money to S.O.S.  by christmas time and so I, Fiona,
the Mary Kay spokes-ferret, am challanging you to look at her website and
order gifts for your friends or personal indulgences for yourself and
feel great about doing it, because 10% of your order will go to SOS (or
your favorite shelter or cause, its your choice, of course).  My human
has spent hundreds of dollars this year on raffles and is a part of th
BAM club and on E-Bay sales that benifit ferrets, but she wants to do
much more (now that I've brain washed her hee-hee-hee-hee)and she has
finally hit upon a way to do that through me, the Mary Kay Spokes-Ferret!
 
**Fionna disappeares for a moment and shuffling can be heard as well as
the faint tinkle of her bell collar, finally she reappears**
 
" The web address is http://www.marykay.com/LadyRae .  It doesnt say on
there that she is donating money because she has no direct control over
the wepage...its just a marykay made up one, but she says that it also
doesnt say, but if your order a gift set of any type your shipping and
handling will be free, or if you go over 50.00 your shipping and handling
will be free!  just think... a 50.00 order and 5.00 of it would go to
SOS!!  Its a wonderful way to pamper yourself or friends as well as those
needy ferrets that you wish you could adopt but can't afford to... this
way you can make sure they have a very warm and snuggly christmas!"
 
**Fiona goes to climb down and be carried away in her pretty pink
cadillac but is stopped by a human hand.  The hand points to something on
her tiny pink papers and Fiona's eyes get really wide.  She climbs back
up to the podium**
 
" Oh yeah, I forgot to say that my hooman will always be donating 10% of
her profits to S.O.S.  So if you want to order stuff from her forever,
that would be okey, because everytime you do, 10% will go to the
shelters, its not just till christmas!  "
 
**Making a little satisfied dook she then climbs as gracefully as
possible down the podium and into the pink cadillac pulled by her brother
ferrets**
 
Rae Edmiston ..................Playing the Hooman
Fiona ...............................Playing the Pink Mary Kay =
Spokes-ferret
Soot, Freckle and Faoli .....Playing the Sable Brothers=20
[Posted in FML issue 3923]