** a light pink (once albino) ferret prances in the room with her hot pink bell collar on** **She finds her way to the podium and climbs up to the microphone and waits for the noise to die down** "Hello? Helloooo? Is this thing on? Ahh.. now I can hear me! My name is Fiona and Im a 1.5 year old ferret who has taken over my humans life! Now my brothers think they run the show, but we all know who the princess is around here.." **a haughty look crosses her ruby eyes as she dares anyone to challange her** "Now... what did I come here to say? Raisins, Chew weasles...Oh I know it was important!" **She shuffles her papers around on the podium with delicate paws and finally finds the one she wants and stands back up** " My human just started selling Mary Kay skin care and make up stuffs! Shes been doing it for about a week and Ive been working on her the whole time! Finally, thanks to FLO I have successfully brain washed her, so that she will be donating 10% of her profits to S.O.S. She (we) have named it the Mary Kay Ferret Foundation! She really wants to be able to deposit a bunch of money to S.O.S. by christmas time and so I, Fiona, the Mary Kay spokes-ferret, am challanging you to look at her website and order gifts for your friends or personal indulgences for yourself and feel great about doing it, because 10% of your order will go to SOS (or your favorite shelter or cause, its your choice, of course). My human has spent hundreds of dollars this year on raffles and is a part of th BAM club and on E-Bay sales that benifit ferrets, but she wants to do much more (now that I've brain washed her hee-hee-hee-hee)and she has finally hit upon a way to do that through me, the Mary Kay Spokes-Ferret! **Fionna disappeares for a moment and shuffling can be heard as well as the faint tinkle of her bell collar, finally she reappears** " The web address is http://www.marykay.com/LadyRae . It doesnt say on there that she is donating money because she has no direct control over the wepage...its just a marykay made up one, but she says that it also doesnt say, but if your order a gift set of any type your shipping and handling will be free, or if you go over 50.00 your shipping and handling will be free! just think... a 50.00 order and 5.00 of it would go to SOS!! Its a wonderful way to pamper yourself or friends as well as those needy ferrets that you wish you could adopt but can't afford to... this way you can make sure they have a very warm and snuggly christmas!" **Fiona goes to climb down and be carried away in her pretty pink cadillac but is stopped by a human hand. The hand points to something on her tiny pink papers and Fiona's eyes get really wide. She climbs back up to the podium** " Oh yeah, I forgot to say that my hooman will always be donating 10% of her profits to S.O.S. So if you want to order stuff from her forever, that would be okey, because everytime you do, 10% will go to the shelters, its not just till christmas! " **Making a little satisfied dook she then climbs as gracefully as possible down the podium and into the pink cadillac pulled by her brother ferrets** Rae Edmiston ..................Playing the Hooman Fiona ...............................Playing the Pink Mary Kay = Spokes-ferret Soot, Freckle and Faoli .....Playing the Sable Brothers=20 [Posted in FML issue 3923]