About an hour ago, I found out my sweet boy Hank had a stroke while being
prepped for surgery for a potential blockage and a spleen growth.  I've
had ferrets for 6 years and I had yet to lose one like this.  You know,
when it was time to make the agonizing decision whether or not to put a
ferret down, I always wondered.  Did I do it too soon?  Too late?  Mother
Nature made the decision for me and God, my heart is just broken.  I
didn't get to say a proper goodbye, at least not the one I would have
liked to have made.  Hank was just the sweetest boy ferret I ever had.
He simply adored one of the techs at my vet's office (and if anyone tells
you that ferrets don't have predilections for certain people, this ferret
made a liar out of them), to the point where he would wake from a sound
sleep when he heard her voice and scratch furiously at the cage to get
to her.  When she left and the vet came in, he always looked sad and
depressed.  I am so thankful that she was there with him--even though he
wasn't feeling good yesterday, he recognized her.
 
This hurts so much.  To think I will never see his sweet little ferret
face looking up at me.  He was just the best ferret.  He woke up every
morning to take his PediaPred and he actually enjoyed the taste.  I never
understood how I got so lucky with him.  I found him when he was about a
year old--he had been surrendered to the pet store by his previous owner.
I always wondered what his previous owner(s) might have been like.  The
first time I picked up him, he licked my face furiously.  I have a weak
spot for ferrets who do that.
 
Sukie, Troy Lynn (if you still read this list), and the rest of you long
time ferret owners, how do you cope with sudden losses like this?  Not
that you're ever prepared to lose a beloved ferret, but when you have to
make the decision to help them pass, you can somewhat prepare yourself
for the hurt and pain.
 
My next concern is my poor boy Rusty.  He is now all alone, going from
having two sisters and a brother two years ago to this.  He's probably
never been alone his whole life (I got him when he was six weeks old from
a pet store that had another kit his age with him).  I know that I should
increase the time I spend with him, and that's no problem, but I am
worried what the lack of ferret companionship (for example, when we're at
work) is going to do to him.  To me, he is still a little baby (when I
got him, he fit in my hand and did the little "wrack wrack" cries).  I
guess he's now my only baby.
 
Someone was nice enough to remind me that even though my heart is broken
over the loss of my boy Hank, it's important to remember that he isn't
suffering anymore and that he's with his sisters Gatsby, Saffy, and Xena
and his older brother Marshmallow that he never got to meet.  So Sandee,
if you're still here, please tell my Hanko that I'm sorry I didn't get to
say goodbye and that his best girl at the vet's office loves him too.
 
Goodbye my Hanko Spank.
 
Hank Martinez
1998(?)-2002 (god, that hurts)
[Posted in FML issue 3883]