About an hour ago, I found out my sweet boy Hank had a stroke while being prepped for surgery for a potential blockage and a spleen growth. I've had ferrets for 6 years and I had yet to lose one like this. You know, when it was time to make the agonizing decision whether or not to put a ferret down, I always wondered. Did I do it too soon? Too late? Mother Nature made the decision for me and God, my heart is just broken. I didn't get to say a proper goodbye, at least not the one I would have liked to have made. Hank was just the sweetest boy ferret I ever had. He simply adored one of the techs at my vet's office (and if anyone tells you that ferrets don't have predilections for certain people, this ferret made a liar out of them), to the point where he would wake from a sound sleep when he heard her voice and scratch furiously at the cage to get to her. When she left and the vet came in, he always looked sad and depressed. I am so thankful that she was there with him--even though he wasn't feeling good yesterday, he recognized her. This hurts so much. To think I will never see his sweet little ferret face looking up at me. He was just the best ferret. He woke up every morning to take his PediaPred and he actually enjoyed the taste. I never understood how I got so lucky with him. I found him when he was about a year old--he had been surrendered to the pet store by his previous owner. I always wondered what his previous owner(s) might have been like. The first time I picked up him, he licked my face furiously. I have a weak spot for ferrets who do that. Sukie, Troy Lynn (if you still read this list), and the rest of you long time ferret owners, how do you cope with sudden losses like this? Not that you're ever prepared to lose a beloved ferret, but when you have to make the decision to help them pass, you can somewhat prepare yourself for the hurt and pain. My next concern is my poor boy Rusty. He is now all alone, going from having two sisters and a brother two years ago to this. He's probably never been alone his whole life (I got him when he was six weeks old from a pet store that had another kit his age with him). I know that I should increase the time I spend with him, and that's no problem, but I am worried what the lack of ferret companionship (for example, when we're at work) is going to do to him. To me, he is still a little baby (when I got him, he fit in my hand and did the little "wrack wrack" cries). I guess he's now my only baby. Someone was nice enough to remind me that even though my heart is broken over the loss of my boy Hank, it's important to remember that he isn't suffering anymore and that he's with his sisters Gatsby, Saffy, and Xena and his older brother Marshmallow that he never got to meet. So Sandee, if you're still here, please tell my Hanko that I'm sorry I didn't get to say goodbye and that his best girl at the vet's office loves him too. Goodbye my Hanko Spank. Hank Martinez 1998(?)-2002 (god, that hurts) [Posted in FML issue 3883]