Debbie said: >I received an email the other day about not posting all my questions and >that after one year at this I should know it all. This was forwarded to >BIG so he can help people stop these private emails. If anyone can say >they know it all, then we should be seeing some new ferret books out there. Since I'm the one that wrote the letter, and I feel like what Debbie said about what I wrote was mis-represented one of two things can happen; BIG can decide this should be posted and can do so, or he can read it himself to understand the situation better since Debbie felt compelled to pass my personal letter to her, on to BIG. I have no problem owning up to the fact that I sent the letter because it wasn't a flame, and it was full of the information you asked for. The BIGGEST part of the letter I you, DID answer (rather thoroughly I might add) your question about young ferrets and their teeth. The rest of it was about the hours and HOURS I have spent, answering letters that you sent to ME asking questions about your ferrets. You do things to help out shelters, and I have always felt your heart was in the right place so I have made EVERY attempt to answer all of your questions. The first letter you sent me after you got your first ferrets, contained over 30 questions. I took about three hours and answered every single one in great detail. In return, I got more questions. Not a thank you. On the other lists, and one ferret newsgroup that you also subscribe to I have again and again helped you out and answered your questions. One about fleas recently springs to mind. Again... no thank you. My biggest comment about the questions that you post to the FML and other lists was because these are often questions I've seen you answer when other people have asked them, or have pointed people to websites that have the information you are looking for. And after having added four more ferrets to your household, and having them all there for almost a year I was curious why you needed to ask about nail clipping. I've personally sent you answers about nail clipping on more than one occasion and the FML archives are FULL of information about nail clipping. I also sincerely asked you if you knew how search engines worked, so that in case you were having trouble looking things up for yourself, I might be able to help you out. I didn't say you shouldn't ask questions, I said that you often complained that no one answers the questions that you ask, and suggested to you a couple of reasons why that might be, including the possibility that people who have helped you out, are never thanked. Debbie said: >Our family is Thankful for all the help everyone has given us. From me and from those others that I know for a fact have taken time to help you out on more than one occasion, I accept your thanks and say that it is appreciated. You might also note, that in the letter I sent you I said "I'm not trying to be mean, or to flame you.." and yet you took it as a flame anyway. Since there has been discussion about forwarding flames on the list lately, I think maybe the danger is that is obvious when someone says in their letter that they aren't sending a flame and it still gets treated like one. I've done a lot to help Debbie out, and this is what I get for it. There are many of us on this list that spend a lot of time every day helping out others by answering questions, passing along resources and offering support to those in need of it. While a lot of those people are lauded as heroes of the FML, a lot of us (not even necessarily myself) go unthanked. If someone is spending time to help you out, please take just a second to send them at least a two word email in return, "thank you." It makes all the difference in the world to know that your message get through and it was of some help. Not exactly flaming, steaming is more the right word.. Robynn and the Four Ferrets of the Apocalypse [Posted in FML issue 2880]