I read of the loss of Ulysses and just wished to say how sorry I am for your loss. There are few who go the extra long mile for a "pet" as you do. I tried sending an e-mail, but it bounced back. I remember having no social life whatsoever when all my guys had ECE for 6 months. They went to several vets, and I was taking them to be euthenized as they were bleeding internally and comatose before I found a vet who knew what was wrong. The animals were bones. Not much more. I syringe fed them for half a year waking up every 4 hours, coming home at lunch to care for them. I changed my work schedule to be home earlier to feed them again. And then I fed them every three hours until I could not stay awake. They had diarrhea, and yet knowing they might die soon, I let them free roam most of the time. They lost their good litter box habits from the diarrhea. The mess I had to clean up, all the syringe feedings, and the fear created wearing and strain filled months. When it was all over-I was numb, i guess, for a month or so. Then it just hit me-that half a year of my life had disappeared, that I had not slept well, that I had isolated myself to save the lives of my guys because there was no time for phone calls or visits. I drove home always expecting death. I remember the day it all hit me- I just broke down sobbing. Take care of yourself please. The FML needs you. I do not weep for Ulysses, who was loved more than most anything or any one: but for you and hole in your life and heart. My prayers Lisette [Posted in FML issue 2841]