Q:"My wife has a theory that other than dooking, chuckling, and barking-- ferrets make noises that are too high for humans to hear. Any truth to this?" A: Wha? Someone saying somethin'? You forgot the "leave my ass alone" squeal, the high-pitched "somebody help me!!!" wail, or the "Your canine is ripping off my ear" squeak-growl. And there is that little grunt-sigh they make when they want down and you won't let them. But you have a good question, and I honestly don't know the answer. It is certainly possible ferrets make sounds out of the range of human hearing, either high or low, but I can find no supporting evidence either way. I would suggest testing their hearing, but a carnivore being able to hear a high-pitched sound wouldn't mean they actually make the sound; the ability may be tied to predatory abilities (like being able to hear a mouse fart from 50 yards away). I recieved this question some time ago, and haven't answered it until now because I've been trying to find something which addresses the matter, but to avail. If anyone has done research on the question, the reference is not in the public domain. However, based on the morphology of their larnyx (the box holding their vocal cords and air passage), which is very much like newborn human babies, I would guess the number of sounds out of the range of human hearing would be small. Perhaps someone else on the list may have the electronic gear to test for these out-of-hearing sounds, and can report it back to the FML. Maybe that ringing in my ears I get from time to time is the ferrets trying to tell me something (....feed more raisins....). It would certainly explain how if one knows a door is open, they all scramble for it..... hummmmmm. Q:"Why do ferrets sometime bite when they lick you?" A: You been watching those tapes stolen from my video camera and available all over the internet again? I LOVED Tommy, OK!!?? It's almost certainly a grooming behavior of some sort. My friend Dick thinks it's because they interpret nekid skin as matted fur, and that's just as good an answer as any. Not every ferret does it; some never do. Some, like my little Sam-Luc, almost draw blood when they chomp down. The licking part is actually the ferret telling you that you are pretty cool person. It's a socialization type of behavior, which is what most non-individual grooming behaviors are all about. Sort of a message that says, "I'm cool, your cool, lets be really good friends." If you watch the ferrets closely, and notice things like length of time for the grooming, and who is grooming whom, you will find subordinate ferrets groom dominant ferrets for longer periods of time. Also, while the grooming behavior towards humans can occur at any time, it most often occurs when you are petting the ferret, which they interpret as a grooming behavior; you start it, they join in. At least that's what I've noticed in my group of 19. And the ferrets seem to pass the behavior up the scale to humans; Carbone and Tui, my two dominant bumbling brothers, will groom my arms for hours; starting when I pet them and lasting long after. The actual biting is a mystery, however. It could be to loosen or remove dry skin, dirt or other debris, even if it isn't actually there. It could be an attempt to kill or dislodge parasites, such as lice, ticks, or fleas. It could be to loosen or pull free matted or moulting fur. No one knows. Dick's idea that it is to loosen matted fur is based on the idea that they pluck and pull at their own fur when grooming themselves (yes, they *DO* lick-lick-chomp themselves), and I think it is a great idea. Ferret skin is very tough compared to human skin, and I suspect what feels like a nasty pinch to me, might be a soothing, even pleasant experience for them. Or maybe they are all into something kinky. Maybe some of the really hairy among us would volunteer to experiment by shaving half their body and seeing how many chomps they get on the clean side compared to the hairy side. I don't know if it would mean anything scientifically, but it would be great fun to see a lot of ferret people running around half shaved. Bob C and 19 Mo' Chompers of Church [Posted in FML issue 2617]