If you don't have a pet I know what you should get They are so cuddly, cute, and calm You've got to get a ferret or two (Chorus): They're so cuddly, cute and calm You've got to get a ferret or two They don't scratch; they don't bite They don't shed; they don't fight They will not tear your carpets up You've got to get a ferret or two (Chorus): They won't tear your carpets up You've got to get a ferret or two Two are nice, four are great Take the plunge, go for eight Now that you're having so much fun You've go to get a ferret of two (Chorus): You are having so much fun You've got to get a ferret or two You've got ten, that's a lot Maybe so, maybe not Have you seen those Australian kits? You've got to get a ferret or two (Chorus): Have you seen Australian kits? You've got to get a ferret or two Now there's twelve, call it quits While you still have your wits Shelter is full, you have to help You've got to get a ferret or two (Chorus): Shelter's full, you have to help You've got to get a dferret or two Fourteen now, that's the end You have gone round the bend Have you checked out Angoras yet? You've got to get a ferret or two (Chorus): Have you checked Angoras out You've got to get a ferret or two Sixteen pets! Don't you see that you need therapy? Call up a shrink before you feel you've got to get a ferret or two (Chorus): Call a shrink before you feel you've got to get a ferret or two Greetings from Mary and the gang of twelve: Aquisition of one ferret equals cost of one hour of therapy I know which is more fun [Posted in FML issue 2449]