Stella is the reason I don't enter contests with my ferrets. She is dumb and fat and doesn't have a fur pattern that would win a trip to the toliet, but her beauty shines from within. I can't imagine a day without her grooming my hand as I scratch behind her ears. Moose is not much bigger than a large female, but has a heart larger than Texas. Not even Carbone and Tui together can keep him from having fun. What Stella misses in her pattern, Moose, a silver mitt with a jet black nose, makes up for in his. Moose specializes in killing vaccuums. Daye is a dark brown sable with a warrior's spirit. If I fail to notice her, I will get a tiny nip on my calf. She is a big time shoulder rider, and loves watermelon more than life. She also loves ruining carpets. Tori is a sweet little albino who cannot stand squeaks of *any* kind. She is the ferret that will hide every squeak toy in the house, and then will sleep on top of them. She never bites when playing with me, just bumps. Bear is just getting over a mystery illness that nailed him during moult time, so his fur is sort of ratty right now. He suffered a broken hip as a kit, so walks like a sailor. He is a brown sable with beautiful and expressive eyes, and he thinks I'm his best friend. I am. Apollo, a MF sable, is a sick little boy, suffering from heart problems that prevent surgery for adrenal problems. He was once owned by a joker who broke out his top canines, but he shows real heart and never gives up. Each day I rub his chest to help keep down the fluids in his lungs, while he chews my wrists. I always let him win. Sandy is an ex-breeder and ex-biter; an albino with terminal cancer. That was, terminal last year. She is still running around with her neckid tail and butt, the poster child for rage to live. She can have anything she wants from me. Her bites are now kisses. Nosette is a chocolate sable from MF, and is a real little tiger. Pay attention around her, because if you don't notice she wants to play, its a nip on the ankle. She taught me the value of ferret-proofing, and knows how to fly. Really, I'm not making it up. Sam Luc is a MF sable who had someone crush the end of his tail off. I think he was hit in the head because he will bite instead of lick when grooming, but he never bites otherwise. I am his best friend, and he will play between my feet for hours. Simon is a MF sable with a rather (naturally) short tail. He loves wrestling with the boys and since he lost his friend Gus, pals around with Chrys and Bear. He is somewhat stand-offish to everyone but Andrew. Ballistic is a MF silver who is my lightweight little girl. She is a whippet, and the fastest thing on two-inch legs. Pick her up, and she will spin her head in 360 degree circles to see everything around her. She is Numbero Uno play hound and loves pingpong balls. Crystal is another albino ex-breeder and ex-biter. She was the terror or the car on the way out from Oregon, and I have the scars on my elbows to prove it. Now, all I get are kisses and grooming licks. She doesn't even bite while playing with me. Fraggle, yet another albino ex-breeder and ex-biter, is blind in one eye (probably a cage injury). She, Crystal and Sandy are best buds, and will all climb into a tube and sleep together, only their three heads poking out. She has become quite affectionate and trusting. Trillian is not an albino, she is a huge dark-eyed white. She is blind in one eye, and larger than many of my males. She loves fighting with the boys, but screams as she chases them all over the room. She loves grooming me as I scratch her lower back to base of tail. Ok, her butt. Foster is my old man. After great inquiry and discussion, the best estimate of his age is 13 years. He is now pretty much blind, and suffers from arthritic hips, but otherwise is as active and happy as any ferret you would encounter. Currently, his favorite pasttime is finding the frozen mouse I hide for him each day. He never fails. Chrys is a light brown sable with a golden heart and a loving disposition. He is the poster child for "I'm So Cute You Can Puke," and uses it well to his advantage. Until Tui and Carbone, he was the resident behemouth, but lack of size hasn't hurt him in the domination category. Jezabell is a dark, almost black sable. She was a holy terror while Jet was around, but has mellowed into one sweet little girl. She has darkened up somewhat, and sometimes I accidentally call her Jet. She loves sleeping on my lap and terrorizing Bastet, the cat. Amber is a cinnamon (or champagne. whatever) sable who is absolutely gorgeous! Pink little nose and bright eyes and sharp teeth. She has latched on to Tui as a special buddy. She inhales chicken and has a special attackment, eh, attachment for toes. Carbone is a dead black sable with blazing white under the mask. He is huge, currently about 5.8 lbs, without an ounce of extra fat. He is still a hob (even with just one little blue marble floating in space if you know what I mean) and I plan on loaning him out to splash around the gene pool. His hobby is rendering chicken bones into slivers. Tui is my part polecat New Zealand ferret. He is just a little bit smaller than Carbone, but is only 21 weeks old, so he will get larger. He is a drop dead beauty that Sam calls a champagne point, but I call a khaki attacker. He is still a tad nippy, but crawls up on my lap to sleep beside Carbone. Good thing I have a large lap. He will also get to splash around the gene pool for a while, just as soon as he gets over his jet lag. Bob C and 20 Showme Showoffs [Posted in FML issue 2355]