Sometime last fall, I met Sam from NZ on the ICQ ferret chat and she mentioned the places she wanted to visit this summer while in the US. I said "gee, those are places that I visit near quite often. I could drive you all around that area." So, the trip progressed and after a phone call from Sam to verify that I was serious, plans started taking shape. My friends started worrying about my sanity and getting ready to make missing persons reports after I met up with the ax murderer that I met on the "NET". I met Sam in the flesh on June 1st in Dallas at kk's place. I left her in Memphis on June 19th. We went through Oklahoma where she got bitten by a bear cub, and had a hard time finding a fridge magnet. We then headed north up to see Linda in Kansas and her large group of fuzzies. While there, Sam ate Buffalo and later saw how they make buffalo chips. We also got to meet Nancy and Troy Lynn and her fuzzbutts and got there just in time to catch, weigh and give meds. Then we had to find fridge magnets. In Independence MO we had lunch with a nice young man named Harley and his mom and grandma and Lynn. I think we crossed Mo several times because everyone had certain dates on our calender. Maggie Mae had a lunch for us and we met the Petersons from St. Louis area and several cages of their fuzzy kids. And we had to look for fridge magnets. One trip through MO we finally...<gasp>...found the...<gasp> ...GREAT... <gasp>...'BHOR'...<gasp>. I knew as I knelt at his feet that he would fill me with all the great ferret knowledge of the centuries. (He also filled us with big breakfasts and lots of food so I would return home 5# heavier than I left). And we did meet the lovely Elizabeth and can vouch for him that she is indeed a real person. Although she had wrist surgery just before we met her, she was a very sweet, smart and mannerly young lady. Andrew was also a sweetie to give up his bed so my old bones would have a nice place to sleep. Foster (the old ferret grandaddy) was like a graceful old man. He doesn't have the energy to dance with the rest of the guys but he came out often for cuddles. Both Foster and Amber wanted to come home with me but 'BHOR' wouldn't let them. With Tui and Carbone (the giants) to keep up with, there were very few dull moments. And we couldn't find those damn fridge magnets. Someplace in the middle of MO, Sam managed to splatter locust guts all over the inside of my new truck. We also met Jerry, Marcia and Ruth near St Louis and had Ruth's great waffles with strawberries and cream. They have 7 spoiled fuzzbabies and several beautiful cats. Looked for more fridge magnets. We then crossed the muddy Missippi into IL and up to Springfield where Sam had to meet all my human kids and go through a surprise birthday party for me. I think she got bored because nobody talked ferrets so she went in and played video games with my grandkids. Found some fridge magnets. One day we drove to Indianapolis to have lunch with a friend of Sams. 3 hours each way for a 2 hour lunch. Sometimes I wonder if I have been out in the sun too long.<grin> Looked for fridge magnets. A friend from Champaign drove over to see us one evening and talked ferrets most of the night with Sam while I got my beauty sleep. Didn't help, I still looked the same the next morning. After leaving Spfld, we stopped to visit with Margie in O'fallon and headed south. We had a nice lunch at Lamberts where Sam caught every roll they threw to her. I would still be crawling around on the floor looking for mine if Sam hadn't caught for me too. We stuffed ourselves there and stopped 1 hour later for double dip ice cream cones. No wonder my jeans won't button. Got some fridge magnets. Then on into a memphis suburb where I left her. I hope she finds more fridge magnets. I guess the moral of this story is if you are anywhere near where this wacky alien young lady is visiting, it is worth the drive to meet her. I don't regret letting my garden go to weeds while I was running around the midwest with her. And she collects fridge magnets from the places she visits. And she talks funny. <grin> SHIRLEY (THE HUMAN) JEZEBEL (THE WITCH) TRISTAN (THE CONQUERER) [Posted in FML issue 2354]