Hi folks, I've been reading todays ferret-list and something kind of got under my skin. I didn't quite know how to express so I'm going to do it the best way I know how. I'm going to tell a short story. I'm not much of a writer but what the heck. :) Now remember this story is just that, a story. This will most likely never happen, but imagine if it did. Remember, to every action is a reaction. Nancy THE LAST DOOK One day without any warning the last ferret on earth died. Yes, people it is sad to say, but the domestic ferret is now extinct. There will be no more dooks, no more errant raisins under the couch, no more war dances. Why you say? Well we have to look at history. You see, they were loved to death. How can something be loved to death you ask? It's easy. Many people all over the world loved ferrets. They would buy one, discover the joys of being a caretaker and then something called "ferret math" would take over. Suddenly there were millions of people with not just one ferret but upwards into the 20's and 30's. The trouble began when people started buying ferrets and then discovered they didn't like, need, want, have time for or maybe just didn't understand ferrets. This outraged the ferret lovers. Many started opening shelters, taking in these little love bugs, an admirable crew were these ferret moms and dads. Some started advocating the altering of ferrets another admirable crew, really now...it was getting to be a problem that needed to be solved. There were also people against the breeding of ferrets for fun or profit. Others were against them being sold in pet stores. Still others felt that ferrets should be sold for hundreds and hundreds of dollars, making it difficult for common folk to have this wonderful pet. Many a child, that back in the late 1990's may have had a chance to love a ferret, can only dream of what it would be like to take care of and love a masked raisin rustler. Soon, the only people who had ferrets were rich. The only ferrets that were alive were altered. The happy day came when no more shelters were needed. Shelter mom and dads smiled as they closed their doors. The ferret lovers all nodded their heads at the fine job they had finally accomplished over the years. Most of the breeders had shut down. "No more baby ferrets, they said. No one liked them anyways, they were evil people you know. They put baby ferrets out there to be adopted/purchased by irresponsible, self-absorbed, impulse buyers. tsk tsk. Anyhow, everyone was happy. Happy dooks abound. Ding dong, the problem is dead. Everyone snuggled with there fuzzies and congratulated each other on a job well done. No more petstores, breeders, or shelters. Everyone who owns a ferret can afford its care without fail. A tiny voice from far back in the corner of the new ferret world spoke. "Dook, dook, but where is me a new fwend?" And another voice, "Dookie do, no more babies. Oh hoomans, what have you done?" And with that, silence became the dreaded invader through the minds of the ferret lovers. Today is that day, the day of the last dook. The End [Posted in FML issue 2311]