Meltdown still loves her walks but she is weak enough now that her most recent one tonight had to be done with me crawling beside her, with my hand under her belly to support her weight and keep her on her feet. As you can tell she will probably not have her glucose test turn out in a way which offers any treatment options. Funny when one hopes for insulinoma, isn't it? She is not in pain, but when cardiomyopathy which is presenting like her's gets to its end game a ferret can linger for up to a week incapacitated and that would not be fair to her. Why should she suffer that frustration? We'll know tomorrow what we are dealing with. Yes, this has been painful, but I would like now to emphasis to people who are reading this that the joy and comfort and love Meltdown has brought to our lives will always be a good thousand fold more powerful than this pain is. Lives without lows are lives without highs, and the tears we shed are usually earned by those for whom we shed them. Meltdown has earned every one of them and we have been privileged to share her life with her. I was thinking also that not only has Meltdown saved other ferrets' lives by helping learn about treatment options, but that if there are any California Fish and Game people reading this they will not be able to avoid learning how truly wonderful she was, and how highly we value ferrets. Perhaps that, too, will save some lives. If you wardens are there: when you are next sent to confiscate a ferret I'd like you to please imagine that it is Meltdown. Maybe then you will recall how she is so treasured, and how she comforted a preschooler and a toddler when their mother was dying of cancer, and how she pampered me after my operation, and how she dried the tears of a little girl whose cat was being put to sleep, and how she helped us care for Hjalmar when he had lymphoma, and all the so many wonderful things she has done over the last 8 and a 1/2 years and you will pretend to not see the ferret, possibly instead giving the person a name of someone who can get the little one to safety in another state. Please do it for the love people and animals so often share, and for Meltdown or for her memory. whatever happens tomorrow is what has to be. I'm crying and Jumpstart is trying to comfort me; even as just little kits they do try so hard to help when something is wrong. Love to you all, Sukie [Posted in FML issue 1892]