***************** SUPER SECRET STUFF F.L.O. DISPATCH ****************** PARTICIPATING OPERATIVES -- Captain Casey : Mission Leader Almighty -- Sargeant Sarge: Fert Mate (get it? hee hee) MISSION TIME : 9 HOURS!!!!!! *********************************************************************** Captain Casey Reporting: What a glorious day for the F.L.O. dook dook! Our silly human let his guard down and, being the highly trained Ninja Black Belt Green Beret Super Secret F.L.O. Operatives that we are, sprung into action as soon as our Silly Human vacated the household! It began like any other day when our S.N.H. (Silly Neutral Human) let us out of our cage for our daily morning romp before he left for some outer-space place that he calls "work". After an hour or so, he put us back into our "Cage" (a.k.a. the Secret Mission Planning Center) and he did not excercise the proper care in what he was doing because ....... and here's the KEWL part ............ he didn't latch the door to the S.M.P.C. properly!!! HAA hahahahahahahaha!! The fool! dook! Well, once he left for "work", Sarge and I huddled together and OPERATION APARTMENT RANSACK was underway. I nudged the door with my nose and, sure enough, the door swung open with ease. Sarge and I slithered out (a specialized FLO tactic) and into FREEDOM! We began to gather together all of the necessary items imperitive to the sucess of any complete FLO mission. We went for the Toilet Paper first. We managed to stuff the mother lode of mother lodes of white fluffy stuff into the Subterranean Under the Dresser Stronghold. We filled it to the brim! We had to seek out other hidey holes for the rest of the loot. We also confiscated other strategic items like: All of the S.N.H.'s shoes, his remote control, his raquetball raquet, a spare set of keys (so that we can venture out into outer space on our own!!) and some stray socks that were sitting in a laundry basket. We captured a little creature (he didn't move at all) that Daddy ... ummm I mean the Silly Human called "Yoda" that he brought back from that outer space place called "Taco Bell" one day. "Yoda" was watching us from the endtable so we captured him and drug him under the downstairs Under the Couch Arsenal for interrogation. No matter what we did to him, "Yoda" (if that was his REAL name) wouldn't talk ...... so I chewed off his face. That'll teach him! We tipped over the kitchen garbage can and proceeded to search for other urgent supplies, but there was not much to find since the S.N.H. had taken out all of the valueable "garbage" that morning. Just a few bannana peels and a yogurt cup were all that we could find worth stowing away in the hidey hole! We tunneled in the laundry and slept in the sunbeams coming through the window. And that's how the S.N.H found us when he returned home: Zonked out in the middle of the dining room carpet on our backs. It was kind of like adding insult to injury! "HA! WE'VE BEEN OUT ALL DAY SILLY HUMAN!! HEE HEE DOOK!" Yep. A glorious victory for the FLO indeed. All of our contraband was confiscated of course and we received a "time out" in our cage for a few hours ............... but it was WORTH IT! hee hee *** END DISPATCH *** Captain Casey http://www.cris.com/~Romoser/ferret.html =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-==-= =- \_/---- Matt Romoser (aka "Romo") -= -= | * | [log in to unmask] ; http://www.cris.com/~Romoser =- =- | | Ft. Wayne, Indiana -= -= | | =- =- / / "The most important thing in acting is honesty. -= -= /__--/ Once you've learned to fake that, you're in." =- -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=SAMUEL GOLDWYN=-=-=- [Posted in FML issue 1883]