Hi , I'm Patty Lou, I'm a beautiful Choc. Lab I use to be an only child. Now Mom has this ugly little white thing running around my house . She never makes her go outside to pee ! She laughs at it all of the time and she is constantly picking it up and kissing it. I thought it was a squirrel and I was going to chase it and catch it and throw it around. My mom said NO! I come from a noble breed and I love my mom so I will obey but, I'm going to make my mom kiss me 1st. I'll just step right infront of her when she goes to pick up that wild little banshee. It never runs froms me as a matter of fact it bites my feet if I get to close its chair. Why doesn't it know I could smash it with my big, fat tail. My Mom is always watching me though. She made sure that I knew that dancing little monster was part of our family and I was to treat her with the upmost respect. As a matter of fact , I think she loves her more. That why I just lay here and constantly look at her with my sad brown eyes and I'll lay my head in her lap while she types into that glowing box. At least I dont nip at her feet while she's typing ! Guilt is a wonderful weapon ! [Posted in FML issue 1826]