Catherine Shaffer prompted re: ferrets that bite -- >(Swamp, maybe this is a good time to repost your special method? >I can't do it justice.) Ms. (I ride a broomstick to work) Shaffer is too modest. Anyone who's entertained the thought of going to work with a ferret attached to her nose knows about biting ferrets. But since there might be other ferret owners with similar problems I'll bite too. ;) If your ferret chomps on people that don't deserve it, you may have to stick your thumb and index finger into the back of his mouth behind the bite. Push your digits together until they meet, then slide them out and in again until you trap some ferret lip between his molars (sorry Mo'Bob, I forget what they're called) and your fingers. That way, if the ferret bites harder he bites harder on you *and* himself. Conversely, if he lets up then he's biting less hard on both of you. If your ferret is stubborn, you may have to push your finger down his gullet until he gags and releases. This technique involves some pain for all, but it's not that bad, and it works. Woody, my former chomper, has not chomped in over a year. Re: ferret lingo -- Sukie Crandall has established a larger vocabulary than my guys want to understand, but they do understand *some* words. I use "Lemme see" for everything from nail clipping to dental examination. When they feel they've sat still long enough, a "wait, wait, wait" will usually buy another 5 seconds. A loud "HEY!" will distract them for 1-2 seconds, which is sometimes just long enough to grab the brimming cup they're about to knock over, or the keys they're stealing from a visitor's purse. Sometimes. "Beach" means it's time for a romp in the sand -- they hear "beach" real good -- "no" they're not so keen on. Actually, "no" is beyond the frequency response of ferret ears, I think. Re: Marshall Farms, politics, and why we're so screwed up -- To me, the biggest problem with MF and the surrounding debate is that it divides ferret owners as a lobbying force, and we aren't much of a force to begin with. So does all the LIFE this, AFA that, NAFA did, FURO didn't nonsense. Upon joining the FML, I was surprised by all the bandwidth dedicated to squabbling among the various organizations. Then came the MF feud and its complications. (Don't worry BIG, this isn't about animal rights; it's about ferret owners' rights.) Then I learned that CA isn't the only place with silly anti-ferret laws, and that NJ and MI aren't the only places where pet ferrets that nip are killed under the pretense of rabies control. Meanwhile, all the petty infighting continues. It's amazing to me that ferret folk, who I believe *do* care about ferrets, would waste precious energy attacking each other while our animals are in danger of being needlessly euthanized. Since finger-pointing is exactly what we want to avoid, let's just say that it's our collective fault that ferrets are still mislabeled as rabid, feral threats to people and native species. imho: the two most important items on the "ferret" agenda are legalization and quarantine. As a group we largely agree on them, and we are all affected by them. Once we've achieved national legalization and quarantine policy, *then* we can start slinging mud around again. It angers me that in fighting with each other we often forget what we're fighting *for*. On Jan. 23, a Californian goes before the court on criminal charges that he withheld information regarding the whereabouts of a ferret accused of biting. The verdict is rather important to him. The fact that he's being tried is important to all of us. swamp "Who, me officer? What's a ferut? These guys?? No, they're Polish cats." [Posted in FML issue 1820]