Oh, boy. I get to share one of the major parts of my day. Poop on wood floors: dissolve some Murphy's oil soap in a squirt bottle of water. Store it near frequent accident spots. Squirt each mess, do something else for a few minutes, then wipe up the mess. Watch out for Mortimer. He likes Murphy's almost as much as ferretone. Other poop: I like formula 409 Protecting carpet from digging: This works with 2 out of 3 ferrets in my household. Buy some of that ugly plastic carpet runner. Allow about three feet per door. Cut it and tuck it in sideways under the door. Make sure there's lots hanging out on the sides. NEVER let them go beyond the door or they will defeat your plastic runner, no matter what you do. They shouldn't have more than a *vague* suspicion that there is something interesting behind the door. I also thought if you could cut some of that hard, clear plastic that they use on carpets under office chairs it might be ideal. Haven't tried it yet. Protecting carpet from digging, part 2: Sprinkle pepper on the floor where they are digging. If it doesn't work, it's at least funny. Protecting carpet from digging, part 3: Get rid of the carpet. We are putting down wood laminate flooring in the family room. From what I hear, this should be even more ferret proof than hardwood or vinyl! Food and water messes: Put food and water bowl inside an old large cake pan. Litter pan: Buy one covered kitty litter pan and one plastic tray of some sort (like the kind you put under dish drainers). Take the top off the covered kitty litter pan and set it lightly on top of the tray. Line with newspaper, litter, pellets, whatever. It's not *very* messy. Again, 2 out of 3 ferrets in our house will use it. Wrong corners: In addition to blocking with food or bedding, you can examing their trajectory. When ferrets wake up from a nap, they cruise along in a pretty straight line, or a smooth arc, and poop when they get to a corner. You can improve your hit rate by adjusting sleeping quarters so that they are in a convenient trajectory to the litter boxes. Don't require 90 degree turns, jumping up, crawling under, or anything else complicated. Baby wipes: I question whether these are good to use on carpet, since they contain oil meant for baby bottoms. You can make your own baby wipes for babies by putting paper towels in the baby wipe container and putting in a liquid containing soap and baby oil. For the carpet, I would omit the oil. In fact, for wood floors, I would use Murphy's oil soap solution. For carpet, I might use a carpet cleaning solution. For the bathroom, Formula 409. Etc. That's all! -Catherine [Posted in FML issue 1762]