Hi, Im new to the FML. I reciently lost both my little girls to what seemed to be cancer. My first little sock theif was givin to me by a navy buddy in 1991. Her name was teya and she was such a joy to have. She had been my companion at times when I had no one. After a year I decided to get her a roommate to make up for the time I could not spend with her. The new one was Mozu. I got this one from a news paper add, and she was the most gental animal I had ever seen. Both became fast friends and we lived together until just last month when teya started showing signs of illness. She had the usual symptoms I have come to read about, weakness in the hind quarters, wasting, lethergy. I took her to the vet, but living in oklahoma there is not a vet that specilizes in ferret care that I could find. He diagnosed cancer and said putting her to sleep would be the best. I refused and started reasearching the problem. Well My quest for knowledge was to slow. Teya was very ill and now Mozu was showing the same symptoms. A week later teya died in my arms. I was devestated. The worst part was the same diagnosis was given to mozu by another vet. I could not let her suffer the way teya had in her last week, so I had her put to sleep with such great reluctance I prayed that I could suffer her illness just so she could be healthy again. It was not until they were both gone That I found I am a ferret fanatic. I can only say with sadness that a sever lack of knowledge on my part, and lack of sufficiant funds to persue treatment contributed to their deaths and for this I am profoundly sorry. I do however know that I cannot live without these theives of hearts and I am anoying everyone with my plans to get two more. This time however I am becoming well educated in their care. I will set aside any and all available funds for their care. My vet will feel abused by the continues barage of articals pertaining to thier pathology and care. I cannot feel any less pain at the loss of my girls than I would if a family member had died, and I feel that somehow I let them down. Still I look foward to continuing to care for ferrets. I am so empty inside. I come home to find all my socks, I sleep uninterupted without the digging nibbling and licking late in the night. I never have to look for my car keys anymore, and the front row tickets to the "dance of the ferret" yeild an empty stage. How can anyone live this way? Well I cannot be stopped in my resolve to find that joy again. I ask for any advise that can be given. Does anyone know of any vets in the okc area or resourses I may persue? I have heard enough controversy about MF to be shy of buying thru them. What is the best course of action in picking out a ferret? What questions should I ask? The decision I have to make must be well planned and flawless. I ask for a bit of your time and advice, of which none is to small. That is all I have to say for now since this posting is gaining much momentum. For teya and mozu, My life was so enriched by your presence that I will never forget that which you were. I honor you everyday of my life and pray for you to forgive my shortcommings. You touched the very fiber of my being to bring me such joy in life and such pain in death. For you I will always remember. (mark cavin) [log in to unmask] [Posted in FML issue 1735]