Dear Bryan, don't be so hard on yourself. Some things are meant to be. You see, life works in mysterious ways. Let me tell you a story and see if you understand where i'm coming from. Some time ago, i was late for work. I ran out the door and drove like a madwoman down the freeway my eyes darting right and left looking for passing opportunities. I glanced just at the right moment between cars and i saw just a glimpse of an animal hopping along the base of the concrete median between oncoming and ongoing traffic. At this point, time stopped for me. I laid on the brakes, ran across the freeway, grabbed the beast, turned around and brought him home. He wasn't dehydrated or hungry so he must not have been out long. Over the following weeks, joe and i went to work on "Ford", a beautiful dark sable ferret boy. He had problems, burns on his chin, a corneal abrasion, and many other problems not the least of which is that Ford didn't know how to walk or run... he only bounced. I dont think i can describe it adequately in words but we believe Ford had probably never been let out of what must have been a very confined cage and the only movement he was allowed was vertical. This story ends very happily. Ford is an enormous, loving bundle of walking and running joy. We can't remember life before him and i sure hope he can't remember life before us. Everyday i drive this same stretch of freeway on my way to work. It is inconceivable to me how this beast got where he was without having been thrown out of a car intentionally. This thought burned me up for some time after the incident. My blood would just boil everytime i thought of the #$%?!** that threw Ford out of the car. But in time i have come to believe that this was Ford's luckiest day, the day he was thrown from a car onto the freeway bound for almost certain death. This terrifying incident was the prologue to a wonderful epilogue. Thank god I was late for work. Thank god Ford was thrown out of a car. So my theory is that one cant hope to understand it all. No matter how terrible this incident seems to you, it probably has a silver lining. Look at how many people get fired from their jobs in desperation and then in retrospect say that it was the best thing that could have ever happened to them. Its a tangled web. There must be a plan in the works for this ferret... We know you tried your personal best. charlene [Posted in FML issue 1734]