My first ferret was a '$59.00 ferret'. I brought her home with the intention of giving her a good home for a long time. Unfortunately, ten days after I got her, Rosie died from what was apparently a heart attack, brought on by her having been fixed at too young an age. I will always be glad that I was able to give that wonderful creature a good home and to let her know what it was like to be loved. I've never talked much about Rosie. It's always been very painful, but I'd like to put down a few thoughts I've had. Please read it if you wish. Judith Dear Rosie, It's been a long time since I last saw you. I want you to know how very much I love you and that I hope, wherever you are, that you're happy and healthy. Do you still do your happy ferret dance the way you used to? After you were gone, I used to remember how speaking to you would make you tumble all over the room and giggle for joy when I spoke to you. It used to make me wonder if you somehow knew that you were living on borrowed time and wanted to live your life as fully as you could. I've spent a lot of time wondering if there was something I did wrong but I've come to realize that there was nothing you or I could do. 'The owl called your name' and it was time for you to go. I'm told that you've gone to a place where you'll be happy and that you have many others with you. Please take care of yourself and any of the others who might be a little lonely. And please tell those that never felt love or compassion how very sorry I am. There are people in the world who try to help, but there are so many who need help and so few to do the work, that we do sometimes miss some who need us. It doesn't mean that we love them any less. I think we love them more and will all rejoice on the day that we see everyone of you before us, free of hunger and pain, and no longer in need of our help. I miss you, Rosie. Even after three years, I miss you and still laugh at some of the things you used to do. If I had one wish, it would be to have more time with you, to watch you steal my slippers and try to drag my thigh-master under the radiator just one more time. (Honey, the radiator has a two inch gap under it--try as you might, you were never going to get that thing under there--and another thing, I found the corner you were using as a latrine--and I thought you were so good about your litter box). But mostly, I'd like to hold you and tell you I loved you just one more time. I have to go now, love. My life goes on down here without you. But you will never be forgotten and I know that I'll see you one day. Please wait for me. With love Judith [Posted in FML issue 1684]