Hello Everyone, This is going to be so hard to write so please excuse any mess-ups and its length. Three and a half years ago I went in to the local pet store to find a playmate for our Buddy. He was about a year at that time and I felt he was lonely during the day while we were at work and school. Anyway I walked back to where there were three 6wk old kits and fell in love with the tiniest of the lot. She was light brown and had a very faint mask and was so tiny and loving. I promptly paid the $120 and left for home. She was very dignified and after watching her put up with Buddy dragging her around by the neck so he could "stuff" her into his box in the cage, I named her Contessa. Soon Contessa was shortened to Tessa Marie (she was too much the aristocrat for just Tessa :)) Buddy never hurt her but I sure did worry and watch closely those first few months till she got big enough to sneak and attack back. She finally got to do the dragging and stuffing of a new kit herself a year later when we got Crystal. I swear she looked pretty satisfied to teach the new one where it belonged. In the box and out of her way! Of course, she never grew big enough to really whup up on any of the other four but she sure gave it her best shot if they attacked first! Tessa was my little girl and would come and greet me when I came in the door if she was out and wait for me to pick her up and cuddle. Then she would want down to do the ferret thing. (running, digging in the couch, stealing the remote, etc.) This past February she gained a lot of weight and was dragging her belly around so I took her to the vet who diagnosed lymphosarcoma. It was about this time I got a new computer system and found the FML online. I sent out an SOS and many kind people and vets responded. One in particular, Gary H., sent me Timmy's recipe and helped by sending me some of the ingredients I couldn't find locally. I started Tessa on this and the steroid medicine the vet gave and she finally started to perk up. She would even occassionaly play and loved the towel/blanket rides again. Last week she quit eating even the recipe. So I started feeding her water and recipe with an eye dropper. She would take this I think in an attempt to humor Mom not out of any desire for the nutrients. Thursday, things got worse and I made an appt with a Wichita vet I had been told about. The appt was for Sat. am. Friday Tessa refused to even open her mouth, we had to pry to get some fluids into her. So Tessa and I went out on the porch (she loved being allowed on the porch) and rocked and talked about her staying with me as opposed to leaving. She gave me her kisses (kinda) but she was so tired. When I got up at 4am Saturday, she had crossed the Rainbow Bridge. She was lying and looking so peaceful that at least I know she went without pain. For that I am grateful, but I really miss her. She is buried out back under our cedar tree which I think she would have wanted. The other kids know something is different (of course they do). What is interesting is that my White Witch (Crystal) is now being very loving and will now let me hold her longer that 5 seconds and give kisses to boot! Before she was just one of the boys and definitly the rowdiest of the lot. The boys have been very tolerant of Mom wanting to hold and snuggle these past few days, too. I really feel for those who lose a ferret that only have the one, it must be even harder than what I feel now. At least, the others are there to give me support right now. I'm sorry this was so long, but I felt I had to write. Thanks for your tolerance. Many thanks to TLE, Lynn Mc and Gary H. also for their support and help with questions during Tess's illness. Thanks to all the FML'rs just for being there and understanding and BIG for letting me ramble. Bye, Teri Buddy (the Patriarch), Rascal (the wild rescue), Bandit (my beautiful little thief), & Crystal (aka White Witch) [Posted in FML issue 1576]