[Moderator's note: Michael sent this to me a while ago asking if I could post it if we ever have a light day again. Today is close to a light day, so here it is. Enjoy. BIG] ... Since this submission is an already published work (in the WNYFLFA newsletter), I'd like to post it to the FML in its entirety for others to enjoy, if possible. -- Michael Burkard [log in to unmask] [log in to unmask] Chez Furo Restaurant Review Or The Adventures of a Human in a Ferret Restaurant By Michael Burkard I was a bit surprised when I first pulled up to the Chez Furo for my visit to review the restaurant. The restaurant had no parking lot, and the place looked, for all intents and purposes, like a hole in the wall -- really, just like a hole in the wall. One could easily say that this was not exactly what I had been expecting from a place named Chez Furo. But, after taking a few minutes to find a spot along a side street, I made my way inside Chez Furo. I immediately noticed that the ceiling inside the restaurant was very low, affording no extra head room. I think it was when I informed the hostess that I had arrived for my reservation that I noticed things were really different at this restaurant. The hostess was a ferret! As I was led through the dining room to my table I noticed that most of the other customers were also ferrets! A few humans populated tables in the dining room, and seemed to be enjoying themselves so I took my place in my chair and awaited the arrival of my waiter. My waiter turned out to be a striking, young, dark sable ferret. Cute, light colored, rounded ears were atop his head, looking like little pieces of soft felt. He scampered over to my table and introduced himself as Squirt and informed me that he'd be my waiter this evening. Squirt welcomed me to Chez Furo and handed me my menu. The specials of the evening included an intriguing sounding Duck Soup, a Totally Ferret kibble entree, and a cantaloupe and Ferretone dessert. I ordered some spring water to drink, and was surprised to find that it came in either a bottle or a bowl. I decided to be what I thought was refined this evening and asked for my water in a bowl. After Squirt had departed I took the chance to absorb some of the ambiance of Chez Furo. While the ceiling was rather low, the lighting and dining room layout made it possible for many of the tables to have a somewhat secluded feel. Most of the patrons were dressed in slightly better than casual attire, and the place had a rather warm, cozy, and comfortable feel. Squirt arrived with my water in a rather sturdy ceramic bowl, nicely chilled. I had already decided to order the house specialty, Kibble Sampler Entree that I had heard so many good things about. I thought that this would give the chef a chance to show off one of his specialties as well as offering me the opportunity to try many different things in one visit. Squirt praised my choice and hurried off to place my order with the kitchen. He then returned with a beautifully arranged, plate containing complimentary breads, goat cheeses, and nuts which I found most delectable. I noticed several of the other patrons pushing their bowls of water around their tables, and splashing water out of their bowls before taking a drink. Thinking this a custom at the Chez Furo akin to tossing peanut shells on the floor of a tavern, I proceeded to do the same when drinking my water. Only one patron was drinking his water from a bottle that was situated upsidedown on an ornamental stand which sat upon the table. Apparently, most preferred pushing, splashing, and drinking from the bowls instead. My Kibble Sampler Entree arrived at my table, and I could hardly wait to try it all. Squirt asked me if I would prefer a silverware setting to eat with, but decided I'd do as most of the other patrons were doing and just dig in. I wasn't sure what to expect for variety since the entree I had ordered contained only kibble, but I was pleasantly surprised to find that not all kibbles are created equal. First I tried some of the Hill's Science Diet Kitten / Feline Growth kibble. The individual pieces were attractive, small, medium brown, rounded nuggets. They had a typical kibble odor. This kibble was easy to crunch and had a warm, earthy taste. I must admit that as I ate the pieces they made my mouth water with each one I crunched. The pieces crumbled into small fragments. The Hill's kibble had little aftertaste, and what there was of one was easily washed away with a drink of water. This kibble was not particularly dry tasting, and it had very little taste if just rolled around in the mouth. One must crunch into this kibble to get most of the flavor. The next portion of my entree I sampled was the Iams Cat Food kibble. This kibble was made up of irregular triangle shapes with rounded corners that were dark brown in color. These pieces also had that typical kibble smell, and were also easy to crunch. Although, these pieces crumbled into small crumbs when crunched. I found the Iams Cat kibble to have a slightly dry, darker, bitter taste with more bite. This was particularly true when rolling a piece of the kibble around in my mouth. As one would expect, there was a good, strong aftertaste as well. The Marshall Premium Ferret Diet was next on my plate. It had an interesting shape, looking like long, thin, cylindrical extrusions of various lengths. Some pieces were long, some were short, some were straight, and some were curved. This kibble had a rather dry, but typical kibble smell. The pieces were very easy to chew and broke down into minuscule pieces rather quickly. I did not find this kibble's taste to my liking, however, because it was rather dry and ash-like in the mouth. The aftertaste was much like the Hill's kibble, and was easily cleansed away. The Marshall kibble also did not have much flavor when sampled without crunching into it. Dad's Kitten Food kibble was my next to last try on my plate, and its shape reminded me of a capital letter 'O'. The pieces had a typical uniform, medium brown color and shape. This kibble did not have a particularly satisfying crunch, and the acidic flavor made my mouth water immediately. The rest of the taste became overwhelmed by the gradually building acid taste during the consumption of a piece. Although, if a piece was rolled around in the mouth for a short time and then crunched into, the acidic flavor was greatly reduced while actually eating, but was very noticeable when sucking on the piece of kibble. My waiter, Squirt, returned to my table at this time to inquire if everything was to my satisfaction. I told him what an interesting experience eating at the Chez Furo was and that while he was here I might as well put in my order for dessert. Squirt recommended the cantaloupe smothered in Ferretone dish, so I took his advice and ordered that for my dessert. Squirt told me he would return in a bit with my dessert, and scampered off toward the kitchen. My last try at kibble was the Dad's Low Magnesium Gourmet Blend Cat kibble. This kibble was irregular and triangular in shape, but with the centers cut out of the triangles. The kibble supposedly contained many different flavors, but I could not distinguish one from another in my sampling of it. The pieces had a fairly good smell to them, but to my pallet they crunched and tasted for all intents and purposes just like the Dad's Kitten Food kibble I had tried just previously. I was finishing off what was left of my entree when Squirt arrived with my dessert and cleared away my entree dish. The Ferretone covered the cantaloupe in a gorgeous glaze, and the entire dessert was served in a beautiful, low, glass bowl. I tried some of the Ferretone first and found it to be a very oily substance with a slight flavor reminiscent of several cooking oils. I did not find it an exceptionally inspiring taste, but when combined with the cantaloupe it was surprisingly good. Needless to say I polished off my dessert heartily. My table was then cleared and Squirt presented me with my check and a complimentary dab of hairball remedy. I tried out the hairball remedy while looking over my bill and found the taste to be very similar to the Ferretone, but with a pronounced malt flavoring. And, it was rather gooey and difficult to get off of my teeth. I ended up working on it on my way out to my car. Overall, the Chez Furo presents a relaxing and comforting atmosphere. The food is very different from typical people food fare, but not bad for a once in a while experience either. I must admit that I am not afraid to try most anything when it comes to food, so some others may be more taken aback by the Chez Furo than myself, but I would recommend it as both a good restaurant and experience. Maybe if I go back for lunch sometime I'll try the All-You-Can-Eat Soft Food Bar I keep hearing so much about! [Posted in FML issue 1411]