I know some of you out there will scoff at the following story but here goes anyway. I have had a very nagging feeling about Racy's death. You see I KNOW I didn't step completely on her and when she squealed I dropped everything and immediately found her picking her up. She just layed there with her head kind of lolling around. There is NO WAY shock could have set in within a couple of seconds of the step. This has bothered me a lot. PLUS Racy had not cuddled in the fav sweater for over a month and is always to be found cuddling with Lightstar and Fang under the amoire...... This time she had cuddled in the sweater and was all alone....... Well I have made a new friend thru this that has dealings with paranormal experiences and has communications with a few that have passed over. Thru one of these communications she was able to speak to Racy and was urged to tell me about it due to the depth of my pain and blame. One thing Racy said was that Mommy did not kill me, I was sick and would have been here very soon and there was nothing she could have done about it... I asked this new friend questions and she got back to me telling me Racy was already in transition when I stepped on her. So the message was that Racy was already dieing when the accident happened.... I had never considered this possibility at all but reviewing all the strange things especially her being soooooo totally out of it the second it happened I have come to the conclusion that Racy was already dieing and that my Guardian Angel Ferrets and Gods sent me to collect trash from all the rooms and made me step on Racy so I would find her still alive and be able to say goodbye and tell her that I loved her sooooooo much..... I have no reason for having gone to collect trash. The trash pick-up was the day before and believe me I am very lazy about picking up all the trash to be put out.... Because she was in the fav sweater she had not been near for over a month and ALL ALONE these things lead me to believe something unusual was up.... I am not trying to absolve myself of having stepped on my beloved Racy but I now HAVE to wonder if I caused her death or not...... I still cry all the time but this has enabled me to find peace within myself and to thank the GAFS and GODS that I got to say goodbye and tell her how very much I love her...... I have received 14 more e-mails about Racy and I want to thank you ALL here since it is just impossible to e-mail all of you back at this time.... All the other 7 kids are doing great and have been up and running and playing like crazy tonite. Weird thing is Silver has been constantly coming out to see me since Racy's passing and to check on things. This is really weird because she has been worrying me soooooo. She has been out at least 5 times today alone that I know of...... Rowdy wanted me to tell you before Racy passed that she has gotten a new winter coat!!!!! It is an unusual color but soft as a baby's butt and Mommy won't leave her alone now cuz she wants to cuddle forever in that new winter coat!!!!! The others tell me they are getting new winter coats soon too because Rowdy can't have all the fun!!!!!!!! Well that's it for now..... We Love You!!! Kelleen, RACY, Lightstar, Rowdy, Fang, Shyla, Silver, Meetoo, Precious, Rascal & Silly!!!!!!!!!!! ***************************************************** * Kelleen & The INSANE Animal House * * [log in to unmask] * * President & Founder of * *F.A.N.G. - Ferret Association of Neverending Glee * *Location : Boise, Idaho * ***************************************************** *I'll take a good animal over a good mate anyday, * *all THEY want is lots of love and great chow!!!! * ***************************************************** [Posted in FML issue 1367]