Coming soon to a sleaze-ball stadium near you: The Loving Handfull with such mega hits as: 1. What a Day for a Nap Time with such memorable lines as: 'and burrow my nose in somebody's new mown lawn' 2. Nashville Brats 'well, there are several million ferrets in the U.S. of A and we'll get 'em all legal on one of these days' and 'Bug the cats; dunk heads into their water Bug the dogs; devour all their stew Bug two-legs; stash shoes like they were babies Bug them all; just play till you are through' and 'Hide her bag; she won't know where her note are Hide his keys; he can not start the car Laugh in your paws so they won't guess who did it Hide yourself; it looks as though they do' 3. You Didn't Have to Be So Nice 'If you had kissed me once or twice you could have put the treats away' 4. that classic of catnip mousie selection: Did You Ever Have to Make up Your Mind (and pick up just one and leave the other behind) 5. She's Just a Mustelid to Me 'But the more she steals, the more she knows there is to steal (Let laughter peal)' and 6. Darling Hug Me Soon 'For the great relief of having your cage to hold you' plus the greatest of their songs: 7. Do You Believe in Ferrets 'Do you believe in ferrets; they won't break your heart But give them full freedom - room's torn all apart And it's weasels; if the back-drag is groovy It makes you feel happy - like a Beast Master movie I'd tell you 'bout the ferrets who can free your soul But it's like trying to teach a badger to dance rock and roll If you believe in ferrets; don't bother to stop 'em It's give me raisins or I'll get the blues Just go and watch 'em; little guys give a smile They'll kiss up your face if you give 'em a trial Their claws are tapping; and you can't seem to find How socks got there ... They'll just blow your mind (riff) If you believe in ferrets; come along and see They'll cuddle till morning then dance until 3 And doubter; if the music is right They'll kiss you tomorrow; sort their treats at night And they'll go dancing, Two-Legs, then you'll see That the magic's in ferrets and they share it with me Yeah ... Do you believe in ferrets? Yeah! Believe in the ferrets of the carpet hole? Believe in the ferrets of the blanket mole? Believe in the ferrets who will set you free? Ahhhh ... talking 'bout ferrets ... Do you believe ... and for those who buy matinee tickets show tunes! such as Anything You Can Hide I Can Hide Better and You Are Witty 'You are witty; oh, so witty whether gritty, or flitty, or sly You are witty You're a most extraordinary guy You are cunning; oh, so stunning whether funning, or running, or fey You're so cunning That you puzzle me each loving day See the little ferret who laughs a lot heh, heh, heh, heh See him laughing so much at me (He's what? Where? Oh!) Such a pretty boy; such a silly boy; Oh, he makes me smile; such a foolish me! I feel lucky; I feel foolish; I feel confused and complete with joy For I'm loved by a really wonderful boy! Agile ferrets dance, form for joy, laughter rampant Soon to sleep away Sukie [Posted in FML issue 1287]