This is far worse than I thought. When a group has organized to the point where they have a term for themselves (uberfrettchen), it indicates a self identity that is dangerous! They soon develop secret pawshakes and other ways to recognize each other at frolics. They will collude and abet each other to win all the events and prove their inherent superiority. The propaganda mills will have a field day. The fringe group that I belong to has tapped phone lines and recorded talks about blood doping and steroid use (there is no Bill of Rights in Canada). Takeshimasan is as wily an agent as I have ever seen. He expects me to tell him how we have rented CIA (Commercialized Intelligence Agency) sky birds (spook talk for surveillance satellites) and have them trained on Japan around the clock. Well, no way will you ever get that from me. I just want to know how he managed to intercept our high resolution shots of his ferret. Oh no, moles! Thought I couldn't mention them on a FERRET mailing list, eh? Not clever enough for us by half (yes, we have British ties). Note the subtle ease with which he probes the depth of our bioengineering techniques in parthenogenesis and cloning. He admits the adeptness the Japanese have for capturing the essence of global tastes and fulfilling them. (Futons are the only couch that is guaranteed ferret proof.) This must mean they intend to bud new ferrets from old ones to circumvent import restrictions once they are in the country. This is not domestic production. Will they dook when they mean a hiss? Aha! So this is why Emi is making this carefully planned trip and is so worried about a seizure. I'll alert the FAA (Ferret American Administration) and have Salt Lake City shut down. Unfortunately, our operatives weren't successful in confusing you about where it is safe. I can only hope that Delta is an unwitting dupe in this plot. What can be done to halt this conspiracy? That is why ENUFF (Enlightened Nuts, Unbelievers in Foreign Ferrets) was started, but we need your contributions. Just leave them in the 3rd stall down in the Men's room at Grand Central Station and we'll take it from there. Next time someone plies you with a foreign ferret just say, "thanks, but we've got ENUFF!" ( )--(a) (@=@=) \ Till next time.......Rudy the ferlosopher O__) \ \___ \ \ /\ * ) \ Rudy smiles maniacally [Posted in FML issue 1231]