Hi Kim, I am new to FML, but have read you emails about Zeus the last few days. I felt like I was reading my own story of the last few months and I cry when I read them because I understand how you feel. I lost the last two of my four kids in a span of three weeks this last January and February. Kitty unexpectedly died during surgery to remove a tumor on January 29th and Fuzzy followed her February 21st. They were "sisters" and Fuzzy just seemed to fade away when her sister did not return from the vet. It is always hard to lose them, but my husband and I found it particularly hard when Fuzzy died, probably because she was the last one and it was very lonely. I cried all weekend and couldn't bring myself to take down their cage. I told my vet (Dr. Ramsell) and my family, no more ferrets. Just like you, I couldn't stand the heartache and thought not having them would mean I would never have to feel as bad as my arrival home to an empty cage. I was dead set against any more animals... Well, I have to tell you that lasted all of two weeks. Dr. Ramsell asked me if I would like to attend a board meeting for the shelter/rescue she works with and who I adopted two of my kids from. I though what the heck and went. It was a great experience because it reminded that while it tears you apart when they go, they still need people like us and without us ferret parents their kind would be a lot less fortunate. I have adopted two more kids, Sylvester and Sully. Its amazing how watching them play reminds me of when my other kids were young and is healing the loss of the others. I have realized that the sorrow of their passing subsides with time, but it is worth the memories I will have of them. So, hang in there, it will get better. Gone, but not forgotten... Kelly in Oregon In loving memory of my fuzzy kids- Whoopie, Jinx, Snowball, Sassy, Tommy, Kitty and Fuzzy [Posted in FML 6283]