Dear Ferret Folks- Lately, my catlet (He's too big to be a kitten, too small to be a cat) Sterling of the lusterous silver fur has been looking for things in my house to scratch. His favourite is the broad back of my velvety green sofa. Needless to say, I am not amused. Not at all. About two weeks ago I started pricing scratching posts, and I was *amazed* by how much they cost. Twenty dollars for a dumb wooden post covered with bad carpet. Now, I am a cheap Yankee, and twenty dollars was out of the question. So I have been hunting. Wal-Mart, Aubuchons, Petco, Stop and Shop pet section, Job Lots, all too expensive. The cheapest model was at Stop and Shop, for eighteen dollars plus change. Not for this cheap Yankee. I was starting to think about carpet scraps and two by fours....nails and a hammer and a staple gun. Fortunately, I was spared the effort. This morning I found something wonderful in Big Lots. I love Big Lots. They sell all the bizarre...well...crap that no other place does. Flamingo toilet bowl scrubbers. Spices that nobody has ever heard of. Hair care products for African American ladies that I have never heard of. The cheapest panty hose on earth. And right now, they are getting all of the Christmas stuff in. In order to cram it all in, they threw most of their pet section into wire bins, and reduced it to half price so they can use the shelves for tiny plug-in singing Santas, and Reindeer sno-globes and such like. AHA! That means that they had two story carpeted pet condos on sale, for *fifteen* dollars. Now, I've seen these for thirty and thirty five, elsewhere, so my tiny, cold, cheap Yankee heart started to beat real fast. At least three or four times a minute. Thses condos are cylinders, about three feet high covered with soft carpeting. There are two stories, one on top of the other, with entry holes one over the other. The little inside cubbies are also carpeted. Very nice, very, very nice....and cheap. I was feeling so good, I actually sprang for two packs of marked down fur mice, and a little thing that looks like a multicolored butterfly on an elastic string. With a bell. I brought it home and put it on the living room floor. Puma walked right up to it and said "Oh, this is mine, now." and scampered right into one of the little cubbies. Well, Sterling thinks it is his, too. He tried to go into the lowest cubby, and Puma bit him on the face, hard. ROWWWER!! Gosh, that is always an awful noise. He decided the upper cubby was a better bet, so he jumped up into it. He hung part way out, to see if Puma wanted to fight for the thing. She did. She darted partway out of the lower cubby, and twisted around to face her rival. Sterling aimed a big, double paw at her head, which she ducked. She climbed halfway out of the lower cubby, and lunged for his paw. ROWWWER!!, again. Puma has biting down to an art. They spent ten minutes alternating heads in, heads out, trying to chew their opponent, and to win the deluxe carpet covered two storied condo for their very own. The dog, the Noble Allis Chompers, mooed her dismay from the kitchen. She wanted to play, too, and knew I wouldn't let her, because she is too big. She was right, I think she's too big to play that game. She could only look on, with big, hurt eyes. I never let her have any fun. Ping woke up and went to see what the fuss was all about. He sized the situation up and pretty much decided that both Sterling and Puma were idiots, who wants a carpet covered two story condo? Not Ping is He. He showed them both his tail, and left to go burrow into the yellow sofa for a long nap. As I write this, Sterling is asleep, half hanging out of the top cubby of the condo, one long leg with its club of a double paw hanging down limply. Puma is curled up in the lower cubby, nose tip to tail, sleeping deeply. Stalemate. For now. Alexandra in MA [Posted in FML 5419]