My Grape Events seem to happen late at night. For example, you might remember the story of Robert and the Dishwasher (when he got his urethra or penile sheath hooked on one of the spokes of the dishwasher as I was emptying out the clean dishes. Poor Robert, though no actual harm was done.) Well that seems long long ago when I had only my first two ferrets and was just getting the hang of ferret proofing, but it was only about 15 months ago. Very late one night a couple of months ago, as "one last thing" before going to bed, I decided to clip my 7 ferts' 140 claws. Oh, hubris -- I did it in their play area while we were all in there together. My technique is to put a fert belly-side up, tail toward me, on my lap, put the Ferretone nipple to his/her mouth, and then draw the bottle down, dribbling onto their chest and belly. If all goes well, the fert lick lick licks through the entire clipping, which starts with the back feet and finishes with the front paws. I'm kind of stingy with the Ferretone most other times -- I want it to be a very special treat when I really need ferret cooperation. Well, that night was pretty chaotic. Why didn't I foresee it? Who knows. Let's say sleep deprivation. I started with Artie (The Enormous Ferret). As soon as the Ferretone was out, the six others came running. <Clip clip clip, little nail fragments flying and falling>. Ferts climbed each of my legs <clip clip>, were on my knees and lap <clip clip>, others came up behind me <clip> and went up my back <clip clip>. A couple got onto my head <clip> for a moment <clip> slide <clip>, and plenty on my shoulders <clllllliiiiP.. There were ferrets climbing along my arms <clip clip clip> and starting onto my hands <clip>, heading for the clippers. Uh oh. <clip clip> Oddly enough there was not much climbing onto Artie, though lots of tongues joined his licking his chest and belly. By the third fert's time, there was Tone everywhere. For example, my fingers, the fert paws, and the clippers were covered with it, making the clipping tricky. And little tongues everywhere. Ooooo, CAUTION! But we finished up with no disasters or even mishaps. Too much fun. But since then, I do one fert at a time, with all the others in their cage. [Posted in FML issue 5250]