Sworry dis checkup be late, my mom be sick and she not lets me use da combuder. I not knos why, I knos how to use one of dem tings but da last time I uses it, I gets into twouble. Da human mom be sick one time afore and I sneaks back to earff to dooes a gweeting, I knos 'bout who be comin soos I twy to wites it. I sneaks back late at night when eberyone apoose to be asweep. I hads a hard time turnin da ting on, I has to push and push and push to make it comes on and den I has to turns on da ting you watches da words on. Den iffins I sits in da chair, I no can touch da ting where you makes da wurds. I wooks awound and I finds books to piles in da mom's chair and den I runs and gets a pillow off da couch and dat helps to boost me up. Affer dat, I be tard and be needin a snack. I see all da odder fewets asweep so I sneaks ober to deir cage and I weaches in atween da bars and I pulls out food. My brudder hiss at me and I say for him go back asweep, I be dere on a special mischon for our mom. I still bees tard and I fights off a nap, I gots to do my job. After a wittle ferrety nap, I wakes up to see da cat watchin me and I tells her iffins she bodders me, I tie her whiskeries in knots so she wuns away and hides. I twy to wites a story but I den I gets tard and wants to take a bweak. Hmmm, dis be da mom's combuter so I looks awound to sees what she dooes on dis ting. I finds letters from fwiends and familee and den I keep looking and den I finds her cwedit card numberies! Oh boy, tweats, I can orders tweats for us! After I order tweats for us I go back to da story. I bees hungry 'gain and I smells somptin awound da ting dat makes da letters, my mom say dey be called keys. I sniffs at da keys and dey smells gud; what be dat smell, I knos I smells it afore. LIZARDZONNIA!! I knos I smells it afore, my mom loves lizardzonnia and dat stinky gwarlic bwead she and dad eat. I be twying to gets da one off dat makes da "D" on da scween. I twies and twies and den acides to uses my teeff. Boy, dis D smells and tasties gud and I gets it off. Den da one aside it smells gud too so I acides to takes it off too. My mom bees a swoppy eater, no tells her I say dat, but she eats at da combuter and she spill stuffs and dat be what makes da keys tastie so gud. I takes off more of dese tings twying to get all da gud tastin stuff off dem, I be sure my mom 'precciates all my hard wurk. It be getting late and I has to put all dese tings back but den I not sur where dey goes. I not gets da gweeting done, I be workin so hard on cweaning up mom's combuter ting dat makes da words and it be time for me to go so I leaves da keys dere so da cat get bwamed for it. I hope my mom can tell da nice twuck man how to gets to da Wainbow Bwidge wiff our tweats when he bwings em. I looks and looks till I wocates all dese fewets and dey all be doing fine. I hads to look dem up on da stump scope by name and den goes and wocates dem. Dey all be living togedder in da same hut and seems to be happy. I tells em I be dere to checks on dem for deir earff mom and dat mades em happy dat deir mom be wanting to knos how dey be doin. Da fewet be called Missy Bon, she giggles and say to me she sneaks back when you be asweep and gives you whiskery kisses, she say you wiggles yur nose just like a wabbit. Dey all say dey misses you and sends you lots of love, snugglies, and dooks. ~~Muldoone~~ Caring for your ferrets at the Rainbow Bridge. Muldoone and Muldoone Enterprises (c) 2005. All rights reserved. Reproduction without permission is prohibited. [Posted in FML issue 5101]