Why There Is No Easter Ferret One day Mother Nature walked by her desk and out of the drawers popped the heads of three of her very favorite creatures - ferrets. She scooped them up in her arms, hugging them and kissing them, and telling them how much she loved them! They all put cold, wet noses on her cheek and kissed her back! "I've been trying to come up with a plan that will show the rest of the world just how sweet and adorable you all are," she said as she put them down. "Come, and let me show you what I have in mind." The ferrets scampered after her, dancing joyfully around her feet. As they entered the living room, they saw a brightly colored basket, decorated and filled with all kinds of goodies! "No reason Santa should have all the fun," she said with a warm smile. "What I have in mind is to fix up pretty baskets like this one and deliver them to good girls and boys all over the world...and who do you suppose I could get to deliver these baskets?" she asked the three prancing furfaces at her feet. "Well, what do you think of the baskets?" she asked. But before the words were even out of her mouth, the furfaces were in the basket! The brown furface found a little yellow stuffed duck. He grabbed it, jumped out of the basket, and deposited it safely in his hidey-hole under the desk. The big white ferret found something that smelled sweet-like food! Yummy! He sniffed and scratched at one package after another! The little white ferret found heaven digging in the grass that filled the basket! Mother Nature was shocked at this kind of behavior! "This is no way to treat an Easter Basket," she said with her hands on her hips! But the furkids did not notice - they were joyfully rolling wonderfully colored Easter Eggs backwards - between their legs across the floor! "Oh Children, you are so silly!" Mother Nature said laughing. Then she started to hum...then sing! "Here comes Furface Ferrettail hopping down the forest trail, Hippity, Hoppity Easter's on it's way! "Yes, that's it!" she said. Let's see you all hop!" "Hop?" the furkids asked. "Yes, hop! Like you are so happy and full of joy to be taking these baskets to good girls and boys! Hop!" So they did! Heads going one way, tails another! Dooking and clucking like you have never heard! Doink into the wall! Doink into the basket! And doink right into Mother Nature's legs! "Dear me!" Mother Nature said, "This is just not what I had in mind at all! She sighed as she glanced out the window - where she saw a rabbit hopping gracefully amid the clover patch. "Oh well," she said as she scooped the adorable little furkids up in her arms. "I will always love you best!" And one by one, she tucked then in...one into his hanging cube, one into her soft, warm sleep sack, and the third into his blue suede corner hammock. The last thing they heard as they drifted off into a delightful ferrety sleep was the sound of Mother Nature's voice as she went outside...."Oh Mr. Bunny..." And this explains why there is no Easter Ferret! Happy Easter Everyone! Judy Cooke Tyson, Hope and Einstein (written Easter 2001 - originally posted in FML issue 3737) [Posted in FML issue 4829]