The Grand Ferret Adventures This Week s Episode: Riordan & Tweak: In Under the Bed (Digging to China) Part One We enter the scene with Riordan lying on his back, absent-mindedly running his fingers back and forth on the corner of the cardboard box he occupies. I am SO bored! he says with an exasperated sigh to the Siamese looking ferret that s stretched out on the floor below him. You said that *gurgle chomp* 2 minutes ago *swallow chomp chomp* Rio! she replies in between mouthfuls of her warty purple ball. Yes but I m BORED! Can t we do something, Tweak? Please? He whined Throwing her head back and rolling her eyes (carefully avoiding one of the many tubes and gadgets sticking out from the box,) Tweak ignored Rio s pleading and continued to chomp on her chew toy. A plastic fish (obviously chewed upon) lay nearby. A few minutes of blissful silence ensued, but only a few minutes. I VE GOT IT! Rio yelled, suddenly sitting up. He jumped down off the box, completely oblivious to the great startled heap of female ferret that lay in a poofed out jumble next to him. Gathering herself, Tweak untangled her legs and smoothed her fur, throwing Rio a look that plainly said I d like to bite your neck, and stash you in a place you ll never get out of We can dig through the guitar amplifier! he continued, ignoring her murderous stare. We did that last week! came the frustrated squeak of a reply. Well, how about we play king of the shelving? We knocked all the books off last time and they haven t been replaced yet Creature from the great dirty laundry pile? No, today was wash day Pop goes the weasel? Oh for the love of ferretone! NO! Forty-five minutes later: What about hide and seek? No Freeze tag? No War dancing marathon? No What about Marco Polo? Tweak paused, and then replied. Yes, lets play Marco Polo. You be marco. I ll be polo Okay, get ready! You have 20 seconds! One, two.. With that Tweak sighed, picked up warty the ball and fish the fish and scampered off. Climbing the bed box she slipped inside and curled up in one of the winter sweaters that had been put away for the summer. We re finally free she said to her chew toys, which had been lovingly placed in the sweater next to hers. Before she fell asleep, she whispered a responding polo to the far off call of marco. Outside of the bed box, Rio stumbled around calling Marco over and over again. Ouch! Marco! Oof! Marco! He called as he stumbled into the chest of drawers. Hearing nothing he continued. Marc-AHHH! falling over the fan cord and landing in a litter box he finally gave up. Opening his eyes he looked around. There was no sign of Tweak. Oooo! Girls are NO fun! he cried. Now I ve got to go find her! He searched high and low and side to side, but there was still no sign of Tweak. Finally, he came to the bed box, and decided to check to see if she was in there. Crawling in, he let his eyes adjust to the dark. Then to his utter displeasure, he found Tweak, happily snoozing away in a dark red sweater. HEY! You re not supposed to be sleeping! Riordan hissed angrily as he pounced on Tweak s sleeping form. Geroff meh! If you don t get up I m going to steal Warty and Fish and flush them down the big litter box! And if you don t get off me, I m going to flush YOU down the big litter box Fine! Rio jumped down onto the floor, but instead of being a sturdy landing, the floor sunk down an inch. Catching his balance. Rio eyes widened and he looked up at Tweak. I think I ve been eating too much ferretvite! I must have gained a whole pound! Tweak, I made the floor sink! Don t be foolish! You re just imagining things. Tweak said sleepily looking at the spot where Riordan stood. Rubbing her eyes, she did a double take. It appeared as if Rio was footless! Rio, the floor DID sink! I told you! Jumping down and landing well away from the sinking floor, Tweak tiptoed over to investigate. Rio stepped off the depressed floorboard, but his efforts to be dainty were destroyed as he tripped and crashed nose first into a box of thick socks. Tweak just rolled her eyes and sighed as if to say, It s happened a million times before. Rio picked himself up and came back over to sniff the floor with Tweak. Nosing the board, they found that it moved easily. Lets try to dig it up! Rio said enthusiastically. You know, that s the first good idea you ve had all day, replied Tweak with a smirk. And so they proceeded to dig and scratch at the edges of the floorboard trying to pry it up. After much grunting and frustrated chattering they succeeded in their mission, and what they discovered was mind blowing (well, if your mind is the size of a ferrets) They discovered a What did Rio & Tweak Discover? Join us tomorrow, for the next installment of Riordan & Tweak: Under the Bed (Digging to China) [Posted in FML issue 4613]