Hi, all. I love my job, but sometimes it makes me sad when I have this much work to do. I need to tell you about the new friends that I have made over the last few days. I met two members of the same Business, Baby, and Petey the Quaker. Baby's heart wasn't very good at beating, but his Mommy says that it was very good at loving! He and Petey are hanging their hammies together in the forrest of white birches, not too far from the Bridge itself. They have selected red hammies, because it contrasts so beautifully with the bright white birch bark. Some day, a very long time from now, they want to show their Mommy, Lois, their matching red collars. They do look very handsome! Baby and Petey want their Mommy to know that Shadow, the hairless rat, is doing just fine. SaraFerrit, who is an expert traveler between all the Afterworlds, visited Shadow in the Rat Afterworld. SaraFerrit says that she saw Shadow curled up inside a giant bubble, the size of a TV set. That bubble was one of the many inside the Giant Swiss Cheese Mountain. Remember, if you want to explore an unusual Afterworld, you can always get in touch with SaraFerrit at [log in to unmask] I don't mind making the trip, SaraFerrit just loves to travel. (Besides, I like it when she's on safari. She bites. Hard.) I met a little girl named Dutchess. Her friend Tyler has only been here a little while, but he was able to bring her up to speed pretty easily. We were in the middle of giving Dutchess a tour, when all of the sudden she let out a little shriek! Well, Tyler and I neatly jumped out of our coats. She kept yelling about her tail. Tyler and I looked at it, it looked fine to us. She finally explained that this was the whole point. Her tail was fine. Finally! It seems that it had been crooked for as long as she could remember. The realization that it was now perfectly straight both surprised and delighted her! Dutches, Tyler and I took a trip to the immense red sandstone canyon filled with zillions of rolls of white toilet paper. Oh, what jolly fun we had shredding and unrolling! We lay on our backs panting after a time. I saw that the sky was a brilliant torquoise blue. I thought to myself that the only thing in the world that could make me happier at that moment would be a cold drink of water, to get all of the TP lint off of my tongue. I said that to the other two and BANG, ZOOM! All three of us ran for the drinking fountain right where the path to the canyon brings you to the scenic overlook. The view from that spot is wonderful! You can't see the far side of the canyon, of course, but you can see the red stone rim of the canyon, and the mounds of white TP piled up against the rim like foamy, white waves breaking upon a red sandy shore. Dutchess and Tyler want to tell their Mommy Phyllis how much thay love and miss her. She gave them the best ear rubs! More than that, she gave them abundant love. I met a little guy named Frosty. His Mommy, Cindy, was good friends with another FerretMommy, Karen. That's why Frosty was met by TWO Businesses. His, and the Scruff You Gang. Imagine Frosty's surprise! He fell asleep, and his feet found the Bridge. He crossed before he was truly awake. When he came back to himself fully, there he was in another world, with Turbo, Chatter, Possum, Flubby, Phantom, Frolic, BigFun, Noble, Pepsi, Sterling, and RinkyDink and ME, all staring at him! Well, he just looked at the dozen of us gathered around in a great big gawking circle and he laughed. He laughed and laughed, until it became contagious. Soon we were all laughing, and then someone in the Scruff You Gang (I think it was Frolic) began to War Dance. Well, nothing is more contagious than that! Pretty soon we must have looked like a giant pack of demented weasles, and that's pretty much what we were. Someone yelled "Ferretone!" and we were off like a herd of thouroghbreds through the starting gate. It was a race to get to the Ferretone Fountain. We scrambled through the underbrush and leapt over fallen logs. We ran up hills, and down. One last burst of sppeed through a sun-splashed meadow of long grass, and we were there! Cool, refreshing, rich ferretone! Oh, it was marvelous. We lapped at it until our bellies were round, then we staggered over to the grass and collapsed, still giggling. We lay there together, chatting, for hours. There was lots of family gossip to share. Also, the Businesses took turns telling funny stories about Cindy and Karen. Those got us all laughing again, so that our sides hurt. The two Businesses agreed that it wasn't fair to say that one Mommy was better than another. Instead, they said that Cindy and Karen were the Best Mommies ANYBODY EVER HAD. And if anybody disagreed, well, they'd have the twelve of them to deal with, and twenty four little front paws curled up into twenty four furry little fists to deal with. That should settle the matter! Well, this is getting long. Tomorrow I'm going to tell you about Greeting Jigs, Sidney, and Draco. Till then, Sandee [Posted in FML issue 4373]