>From: "Scarlet L." <[log in to unmask]> >Subject: Do they come back to visit? >Well it's been three days since CJ passed and some strange things have >happened. Jennifer, and all- I am so envious of you guys. I don't have any real beliefs about the afterlife, but I'm someone who could definitely believe they are visiting- especially if I had a visit myself. But, I haven't. Scooter has been gone for 4 weeks now- it seems more like 4 months, and he has not visited me that I know of. I keep hoping to see/hear/"feel" something- anything. But there's nothing. I hung a windchime in the backyard as part of his special garden. When it chimes, I *like* to think that he is somewhere pausing whatever he's doing and thinking of me, but I don't feel that very strongly- it's just something I tell myself to feel like I still have some sort of connection with him. I'm very disappointed that I seem to not be able to connect with him again. The only slightly strange thing that has changed since he's been gone is that our other male, Freddy, has been much more active. Freddy is over 5 yrs old and got along with Scooter, but Scooter, though younger, was definitely the alpha- in a nice way. Freddy is just kind of a wimp :-). It used to be that Freddy, being older and having some health problems, was just sleeping more and more and it seemed like I rarely saw him or our other ferret- also over 5- Peanut much. Just Scooter- that's one of the reasons it's been so hard to lose him- he was the one who always was awake, wanting to hang out with us, waiting when we got home.... But Freddy and Peanut just seemed to sleep more and more as they've gotten older. Now Freddy is awake and about much more of the day. When I'm working at home he is often scratching at my legs, wanting me to pick him up, give him a drink of my water, whatever. The other day I put him down on my desk so he could poke around. I had forgotten that Scooter's collar is in a little ziplock baggy on my desk until I heard a lot of jingling. Freddy had found the bag and looked like he was trying to get into it... Now, he does like plastic so, as my husband who is very logical, pointed out, maybe he just liked the bag... I don't know. But I don't know why Freddy is up so much more and running around more now. The part of me that is open to the idea of "visits" and such *wants* to think that Scooter has somehow come back through Freddy and Freddy has acquired some of Scooter's energy... Freddy is still Freddy- he has a different personality than Scooter. When I look at him, I want to see Scooter- something, some sign (btw, they look NOTHING alike, so that is kind of hard to see Scoots in him...), but I just see... Freddy. I would like a visit. I don't have much- I have some pictures that I've had to turn face-down all this week because I couldn't look at them. I have Scooter's garden and tree I planted since he died, but there's still such a huge piece of my life that none of those things will ever quite fill it. I'm sure those of you who have lost a little guy know exactly what I mean. I'll keep waiting, hoping for a visit from him. I hope you that have had one know how lucky you are. I hope you have more visits if they are comforting to you. Jaime Freddy and Peanut, missing Scoots-a-baby [Posted in FML issue 4157]