Hi Folks!! I have told a few people about this and before it gets around and blown out of proportion, I figured I had better let everyone know what is going on. (I told one person, and someone else called me about it and wasn't in a good state of mind - not you Kat) I have been spending time down at the Cleveland Clinic going through lots of tests. I have been diagnosed with Cancer. A sarcoma to use the general term. It is attached to my left thigh and about the size of a pineapple. (Most women have cottage cheese thighs, I have pineapple and cottage cheese). First, we have a game plan for caring for the ferrets and adoptions will continue, I won't be handling it though, Jane will, she know the ferrets as well as I do, since she is here twice a week. Me, I am going to work on organizing the office so they can find anything that will be needed while I am sleeping the nuking off. There are about 35 different types of sarcomas that humans can develop, I just happen to have a system that picked one of the rare ones. 9000 people a year are diagnosed with it. I also have a 1 in 500 chance of developing it again. (Better odds than the lottery!) Another thing I am looking at is the fact if any cancer cells entered the blood system, it will attack my lungs, hence the chemo treatments. But for the rest of my life I have to have MRI's and CAT scans done to make sure it doesn't reappear in my lungs or anywhere else. Kind of fitting, ferrets get sarcomas, I run a ferret shelter, and I love them dearly, and I have something in common with lots of ferrets. Normally they would do surgery to remove it and then follow up with radiation and chemo. Well, since it is so big, and near the nerve system, and the vascular system, surgery first is out of the question, there are too many risks to the leg. They are going to try to shrink it first by doing radiation and chemo. So for the next five weeks, I will be at the Cleveland Clinic, five days a week becoming a glow in the dark shelter wench. During the treatment, the first week or two I will be ok, maybe a little more tired. The third week or so, I will be suffering from having my butt kicked and exhausted. They are going to make arrangement for me to have a scooter at work so I can continue working and not have to walk the football field of a store five or six times a night. Then it is on to no radiation or chemo for about three weeks, allowing the body time to heal, followed by surgery, time to heal, and then more glow in the dark treatments. Now, the sarcoma can shrink, and that would be good, but there also is a chance that the cancer is so advanced that it actually will start to grow at an accelerated rate. Oh lucky me!! (The odds of winning the lottery are getting smaller and smaller!!) I plan on working as long as I can, I can't afford not to, that is where I have my health insurance, and if I don't work, I don't pay for it and that can be a big problem. Ok, that is the gist of what is going on, now let me tell you how freaked out I have the doctors. Apparently this thing is suppose to hurt. And it doesn't, which really shocks them. They say, "It doesn't hurt?", I say, "No, I don't have time for that or your silly little questions." They say, "It is malignant, do you know how serious this is?", I say, "Well duh, of course it is malignant, it didn't grow to a pineapple size because I gave it fertilizer!!". They say, "You run a risk of losing your leg". I say, "One leg or two the ferrets won't care, as long as they get their treats, played with, cuddled and their cages cleaned, and besides, one leg or two my husband will still love me, if I have one leg, that means I have one less leg to throw over his back at night and less chance of a back ache in the morning." They say, "You don't understand how serious this is". I say, "Don't be stupid, of course I do, you don't understand this is a BIG inconvenience for me, I have a shelter to run and a job and a family, I don't have time for your silly little over serious crap." They say, "You don't understand." I say, "Yes I do, and just because you tell me I have Cancer, doesn't mean I am going to be some mamsy pansy and fall apart, I understand all too well. Your cure is going to make me sick, lose my hair, and hurt, really bad, you are going to totally screw up my chaotic life, and make it even worse, so lets get going and get this done!! You want to nuke me, nuke me, you want to take the leg off, then do it, I don't have time for all this other crap. Let's just do it, because the cure is going to be a heck of allot worse the disease." They say, " You do realize that there still is a chance of losing the leg, or some serious complications, like it being very swollen, circulation, and the bone will be weaker so it is prone to breaking." I say, "Look, I am a klutz anyway, and I refuse to let you leave me with something that is going to make my life worse. So, you better be sure on what is going to happen. Because in my little world, one leg is better than one good leg and one that is totally useless and gets in my way, or one as big as a tree trunk, and gets in the way." They say, "You don't understand." I say, "I understand far better than you think, I am not stupid, and I understand the results of the choices I make, and if you say I don't understand one more time, I am going to hurt you, and you can consider that a down payment on the pain I am going to be getting from you because of the cure." Then he says, "Well we have drugs for pain." I look at my husband, and ask "Can I hit him now?" Oh yeah, I told a very dear friend of mine last night, a ferret owner. She asks "How did you get it?" Me with my warped sense of humor, "Oh that is easy, sarcomas are very common in ferrets, and since I breath lots of poop fumes, it came from the poop fumes." Her reply, "Oh my GOD!! What are you going to do?" After laughing my butt off and nearly wetting myself, I explained to her I was joking, and no matter what I couldn't have gotten it from breathing poop fumes, it is just an impossibility. Then she saw the humor. I guess I am going to have to be more careful on how I joke around, huh? No, I totally LOVE the reaction. So, that is one of life's little inconvenience that I have no time for. Just one time, I wish something would happen so I would have time for everything!!! Sigh. Time to play with ferrets. Jean Ferrets Unlimited Ferret Shelter Cleveland, Ohio www.ferretsunlimited.org [Posted in FML issue 4056]