It would be a shame to let this whole Verizon ferret commercial fiasco go by without trying to turn it into something good. Verizon wants to make a good name for itself, and ferret owners want to educate the public and lawmakers about the true nature of their pets. Those two goals are not incompatible. Here is my letter to Verizon: -------------- Verizon Wireless Greg A. Klimek - President 15505 Sand Canyon Avenue, E2 Irvine, CA 92618 Dear Mr. Klimek: I know that by now you have received a number of comments regarding the Verizon Wireless ferret commercial in which a domesticated ferret latches on to the tongue of its owner. I am sure that you are beginning to get a sense of the everyday prejudice faced by ferret owners, in the form of both derogatory comments and outright bans on ferret ownership. Instead of simply asking you to pull the commercial to reduce the amount of damage done, I would like to suggest a positive course of action that could gain some wonderful publicity for your company and greatly help the plight of ferret owners. First, let me give you some background. In California, the domesticated ferret is classified as a wild animal by the Department of Fish and Game, and is therefore illegal to own as a pet. The hypothetical scenario put forth by the DF&G is that domestic ferrets could escape from their homes, start breeding in the wild, and form feral colonies that would damage the native ecosystem. This series of events seems pretty unlikely in light of the fact that the vast majority of ferrets are spayed or neutered, that the unfortunate few who do manage to slip out of the house rarely survive more than a few days on their own, and that there has never been a feral colony of domesticated ferrets anywhere in the country. Nevertheless, the story is frightening enough to sway a number of California legislators against supporting legalization. The one thing that would really help ferret owners make their case would be to conduct an Environmental Impact Study (estimated to cost between one hundred and two hundred thousand dollars). Californians for Ferret Legalization is a group that has done an amazing job of educating lawmakers and the public about the true nature of ferrets. This organization has helped introduce several bills to the California legislature. Unfortunately, CFL runs on a shoestring budget and there is no way they could come up with the money to conduct the Environmental Impact Study which now seems to be so vital to their cause. I would like to offer you the opportunity to help by donating funds to pay for an Environmental Impact Study. In return, you would win the loyalty of hundreds of thousands of California ferret enthusiasts, as well as millions of pet owners across the country. The effects of a commercial can only last for so long, but an act of generosity allowing a whole section of the population to enjoy their cherished pets in peace will be long remembered and rewarded. If you would like more information about Californians for Ferret Legalization and the history of legislative efforts, you can visit their website at www.ferretnews.org. If you would like any other information about ferrets and their antics, feel free to write to me or call me at ******, and I can point you to the right sources. Thank you so much for considering this suggestion. I greatly appreciate any support that you can provide. Sincerely, ***** [JE] [Posted in FML issue 3875]