Dear Ferret Folks- It was just another normal evening at home here. Me, my husband, his ferret Switch and I curled up on the great American sofa in front of the great American timewaster, the T.V. Yup. A man, his weasel, and his wife. ( My ferret, Sabrina the Bat-Biter, was sensibly asleep, she never was much for T.V. even back when she could see farther than her own whiskers.) My husband Dann and Switch were watching some *really lame* kickboxing movie drama, and sharing a nice cold mug of rootbeer. Dann has this huge insulated plastic mug. Every time I took my eyes from the *really lame* kickboxing movie and looked over at the two of them I saw what looked like a gray, furry eggplant with two little feet hanging over the edge of the mug. The head end with the two front feet were actually inside of the mug, where they could not be seen. What could be seen of Switch looked like a little mink upholstered drunk heaving into the john during a bad college party, you know, riding the porcelain bus? Blauuugh! Urf!,Urf! Blauuugh! You get the idea. Actually, that's just the way Sabrina hangs out of the dog's food bowl when she decides to help herself to a nice snack of Purina. She throws herself over the rim of the bowl and grazes while the dog gives me this amazing long suffering look while her eyebrows do that things that dogs do, the thing that lets you know they are in unspeakable psychic agony. "Oh pleeeeze, not my foooood, is nothing sacred?" By the time the *really lame* kickboxer's brother is paralyzed for life in a scene fraught with high drama (ever seen Jean Claude Van Damme pretend to cry? Blauuugh! Urf!,Urf! Blauuugh!) Switch's little belly was round and hard. She had taken her fill of rootbeer. Now it was time to walk across the sofa and bother the wife, as in lick, lick Chomp! Right on my arm. Without missing a beat I scruffed the b**** and BIT her while Jean Claude Van Damme (Blauuugh! Urf!,Urf! Blauuugh!) wailed in the background. I did not lick her first, I just bit. It gets her attention like nothing else does. Anyway, like I said, just another normal evening at home, here. Alexandra in Massachusetts Switch the Kit: "She BIT me! That freak actually BIT me!" Sabrina the Bat-Biter: "Well, you bit her first." [Posted in FML issue 3805]