Okay, you folks already know that Jumpstart passed away earlier this year. Some remember him as the guy who helped jumpstart Meltdown when she had her cardiomyopathy and was getting depressed temporarily, others as the boy who would walk bipedally for tambourine playing. Jumper passed away unexpectedly and it has taken time to get used to this, for us and for the vets. We've all be questioning ourselves saying, "What could we have done differently?" and the answer keeps coming back that pretty much all that could be done was done and that if his problem had been found sooner since it was one of the untreatable (rare) ones he may have gotten a mercy shot too soon. Usually, with a thoracic tumor the ferret is going to be a kit with JL. Now, we all know what a heart breaker JL is and how it can flummox vets at times because sometimes it can't be found without specialized equipment that most vets don't have. For those who don't know, Juvenile Lymphoma usually hits within the first 18 months of life though it can happen later, is very blessedly rare, progresses rapidly and can even be hidden till extremely late, and is fatal. It often causes thoracic tumors and neurological tumors. EITHER of these can be very hard to find. (That is not only true in ferrets but also in humans; my mother had pain from a terminal thoracic tumor for three years before someone finally found it despite constant searching.) One of the realities of such things is that the person left behind is shell-shocked, sometimes vets pull out all stops trying to save a ferret because the cause of the extremely poor health isn't found so there might be hope, and sometimes the person who loses the ferret blames the vet for trying when the vet had little option or blames the vet for a death that never could have been helped. It is a large cause of misplaced anger and misplaced blame through the years. Jumpstart was special and very individual,but saying that for a ferret is meaningless because they all are. He was a kind and gentle boy with a shy personality like is seen in some rescue greyhounds and complete devotion to his family. For months he'd had x-rays, blood tests of many kinds, multiple ultrasounds, pulled node, exploratory when his L adrenal came out, etc. Maybe a marrow sample would have spotted his problem, but nothing pointed to a reason to take one, and it may not have helped. The symptoms exhibited at home after a while looked like very early cardiomyopathy and a weight increase (fat, not fluids till his last day) but no signs of cardiomyopathy were found. We'd managed to spot that disease in 2 others before early enough that it couldn't yet be diagnosed, and we also realized that perhaps -- despite tests not saying so -- that his right adrenal might be in early stages of a neoplasia as another or additional option. So, we were all watching and testing, and testing more. Then he got a bit more tired and we were arranging schedules to set an appointment for more checking when he woke up one morning with rapid breathing, pain, ascites, and belly bruising. Got him immediately to vet along with a big male ferret to give a transfusion and they found that a hidden thoracic tumor had taken off. It was Jumpstart's last day. Anyway, I just wanted to let people know, that sometimes even when you try your hardest and the vets try their hardest that sometimes you and the vet are just up against something that nothing can be done about. It's a time when some people blame themselves and some blame the treating vets. We blamed ourselves at first and our vets blames themselves at first, but really it was not anyone's fault, as we all concluded after much discussion and thought. that it wasn't found till that day when he was suddenly so ill. Some diseases just are impossible this way. If it had been found earlier perhaps he'd have been given a mercy shot sooner than the same day that he already dying -- to avoid the pain that would one day certainly come given what thoracic tumors are like. Maybe he had months and months of cuddles and kisses that he would not have otherwise enjoyed. There are situations in this world that are not blame situations, and while placing blame or being angry may seem to ease grief in the short term they worsen it longer term. [Posted in FML issue 3746]