Dear Ferret Folks- Anonymous poster asked yesterday >Hey, is it normal for a new ferret (10 weeks) to only want to play all >day? Mine doesn't want to be held or cuddled, it just wants to chase my >toes and the dog! Dear Poster, have you ever heard of the perpetual-motion machine? Many people have claimed to have invented one, but the U.S. patent office denies ever having been presented with a feasable plan for one. It remains the Holy Grail of the amateur inventor...sort of the way phyisists dream of engineering a genuine cold-fusion reaction. Many have tried, to date all have failed. In the natural world, the closest analog to the perpetual motion machine is the young ferret. They squirm, wiggle, bounce, climb, scramble, dig, slither, gallop, pounce, leap, dance, twist, sniff, and sneak. Ceaselessly. It is even widely held that some can levitate, or even teleport from one place to another instantaneously. (Me, I suspect that they disassemble their molecules into a sort of vapor-cloud or palsma and ooze beneath closed doors or little gaps, but that's just my theory.) They have two speeds, and only two. They are either on, i.e. writhing to get out of your arms and on to the floor where they proceed to wreak unimaginable, enthusiastic havoc, or they are off, i.e. sound asleep in the hammock. Get used to it. Sincerely, Alexandra in Massachusetts [Posted in FML issue 3728]